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Pirates of the Caribbean: Community Prequel Script

<!--quoteo(post=252485:date=Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252485"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Hmmm. No GW moment? I like that image of Jack standing at the front of the boat with his hands on his hips and one leg up and then stumbling off the boat but I do see your point. I wouldn't want to lose it too though.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->No GW moment? HUH? That's NOT what I said. I most certainly DO want the GW moment; I just don't want Jack to bumble right after. Let him think he succeeded at being heroic for a little while longer, then bust his bubble when he holds that map upside down.

<!--quoteo(post=252485:date=Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252485"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Maybe. I don't know if the villagers would have the same over protective sense that we would have. Its a different culture. Children are called on to do far more.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->True. It can go either way, I suppose. But if children are supposed to do more, doesn't it become even more important to keep them alive and thus not allow them to play on a water wheel? What I am saying sounds really weird. "More important to keep them alive"? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/piratesing.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shock" border="0" alt="piratesing.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252485:date=Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 24 2008, 07:58 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252485"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->That's a good point, Pieter. I have been thinking she was one of the chiefs too, but she would actually be the village witch. So with that in mind, does Jack necessarily go see her first or the chief?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Indeed Jack would probably go and see the village chief first. Unless Tia were to intercept Jack before he'd reach the chief. That would allow Jack to talk with Tia while Mercer and/or Edwards can talk with the village chief to discuss the "trade to be established". Then they resupply, Mercer and EITC soldiers stay behind, Jack and Edwards sail to port, the villagers are captured and walked to port over land and are then loaded aboard the Wench. Or something like that anyway. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
Maybe Mercer and Edwards go to see the Chief and Jack goes and sees Tia? Maybe? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

Oh, lol, Pieter i meant reasonably content about 78.4532% Happy... :p


And for the water wheel, i am expecting it to be slow moving, so if they fall, they hit water and are safe. Dont worry...
 
<!--quoteo(post=252486:date=Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252486"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->No GW moment? HUH? That's NOT what I said. I most certainly DO want the GW moment; I just don't want Jack to bumble right after. Let him think he succeeded at being heroic for a little while longer, then bust his bubble when he holds that map upside down.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I should have clarified that. I didn't mean to suggest that you didn't want a GW moment in the script, just maybe in that scene. What you suggest, isn't that how the scene is set up? Or maybe should we lengthen it a bit after his GW moment and before the map bumble?

<!--quoteo(post=252486:date=Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252486"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->True. It can go either way, I suppose. But if children are supposed to do more, doesn't it become even more important to keep them alive and thus not allow them to play on a water wheel? What I am saying sounds really weird. "More important to keep them alive"? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/piratesing.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shock" border="0" alt="piratesing.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Well, of course. But, maybe its not a toy for them. Maybe we could have the kids playing on it and some adults come running over and chase them off.

<!--quoteo(post=252486:date=Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 02:15 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252486"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Indeed Jack would probably go and see the village chief first. Unless Tia were to intercept Jack before he'd reach the chief. That would allow Jack to talk with Tia while Mercer and/or Edwards can talk with the village chief to discuss the "trade to be established". Then they resupply, Mercer and EITC soldiers stay behind, Jack and Edwards sail to port, the villagers are captured and walked to port over land and are then loaded aboard the Wench. Or something like that anyway. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
It can go something like that. Jack, Edwards, Mercer and the marines come off. They enter the village. Tia intercepts Jack and Edwards goes over to talk to the chief.
 
<!--quoteo(post=252664:date=Apr 24 2008, 04:56 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 04:56 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252664"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Maybe Mercer and Edwards go to see the Chief and Jack goes and sees Tia? Maybe? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

Oh, lol, Pieter i meant reasonably content about 78.4532% Happy... :p


And for the water wheel, i am expecting it to be slow moving, so if they fall, they hit water and are safe. Dont worry...<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
That's what I was thinking, Mercer, or like I said in my response to Pieter, maybe the adults could chase them off as the camera pans by it.
 
<!--quoteo(post=252664:date=Apr 24 2008, 10:56 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 10:56 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252664"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Maybe Mercer and Edwards go to see the Chief and Jack goes and sees Tia? Maybe? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->That's what I suggested previously, isn't it?

<!--quoteo(post=252808:date=Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252808"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I should have clarified that. I didn't mean to suggest that you didn't want a GW moment in the script, just maybe in that scene. What you suggest, isn't that how the scene is set up? Or maybe should we lengthen it a bit after his GW moment and before the map bumble?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->The current rewrite:<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->SEA - DAY

Two boats are seen making their way to the shore. In the first boat,
JACK SPARROW is standing heroically in the front. As the boat bumps
into the shore, JACK <b>bumbles</b> from the bow onto the beach. His sailors
also get out. Then the second boat bumps into the shore and Mercer,
Edwards and a contigent of EITC marines get out.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
My suggestion:<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->SEA - DAY

Two boats are seen making their way to the shore. In the first boat,
JACK SPARROW is standing heroically in the front. As the boat bumps
into the shore, JACK <b>steps</b> from the bow onto the beach. His sailors
also get out. Then the second boat bumps into the shore and Mercer,
Edwards and a contigent of EITC marines get out.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
It's just a one-word difference. Per my suggestion, Jack doesn't trip when he steps out of the boat. That way we don't make him look like a fool <i>prior</i> to him holding the map upside down. We don't need to make Jack look like a fool twice in a minute, do we? Sounds over the top to me. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252808:date=Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252808"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Well, of course. But, maybe its not a toy for them. Maybe we could have the kids playing on it and some adults come running over and chase them off.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->That sounds fine to me. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252808:date=Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 25 2008, 12:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252808"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->It can go something like that. Jack, Edwards, Mercer and the marines come off. They enter the village. Tia intercepts Jack and Edwards goes over to talk to the chief.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->LOL. Seems like you, Mercer and me all suggested pretty much the same thing concerning this. I think we should go with this idea, because obviously we're agreed on it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=253512:date=Apr 27 2008, 05:57 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 27 2008, 05:57 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=253512"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->It's just a one-word difference. Per my suggestion, Jack doesn't trip when he steps out of the boat. That way we don't make him look like a fool <i>prior</i> to him holding the map upside down. We don't need to make Jack look like a fool twice in a minute, do we? Sounds over the top to me. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
That sounds good. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" /> I agree, he shouldn't be too much of a bumble. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> But do we do a GW scene later on, maybe with the French pirate? We do want him posing on the boat and then stumbling out somewhere along the line, don't we?
<!--quoteo(post=253512:date=Apr 27 2008, 8:57 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 27 2008, 8:57 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=253512"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->LOL. Seems like you, Mercer and me all suggested pretty much the same thing concerning this. I think we should go with this idea, because obviously we're agreed on it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I guess so. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> Sorry I didn't remember you posting that idea, Pieter. There are so many to keep track of.
 
To start to give him his drunken walk and bumbling lol. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=253532:date=Apr 27 2008, 08:52 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 27 2008, 08:52 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=253532"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Why does Jack need to bumble after his GW moment?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
To add a touch of irony. Jack is very much trying to be the leader here, to take charge, and it would be keeping in character for him to bumble at that moment. Picture the visual: Him standing at the bow, arms folded, classic Washington pose, maybe even speaking some encouraging words. Then when they hit the shore he maybe starts to bark out orders and then bumbles. That would show he's still just Jack, no matter how heroic he seems.
 
But the touch of irony already comes in him holding the map upside-down. I just think one tocuh of irony is enough to get the point across. But I think it might be better to just continue with the next scenes; it's not important enough to keep discussing ad infinite.
 
<!--quoteo(post=253668:date=Apr 28 2008, 04:37 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 28 2008, 04:37 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=253668"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->But the touch of irony already comes in him holding the map upside-down. I just think one tocuh of irony is enough to get the point across. But I think it might be better to just continue with the next scenes; it's not important enough to keep discussing ad infinite.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
That is true. So, are we going with this combined scene of yours, at least for now?




SEA - DAY

Two boats are seen making their way to the shore. In the first boat,
JACK SPARROW is standing heroically in the front. As the boat bumps
into the shore, JACK bumbles from the bow onto the beach. His sailors
also get out. Then the second boat bumps into the shore and Mercer,
Edwards and a contigent of EITC marines get out.


JACK
(looking at the EITC marines)
So what do we need them for again?


MERCER
There might be a time when you'll be happy we took them.
Now let's have that map, if you please.


JACK
(giving Mercer a suspicious look)
As captain on this here venture of your'n, I'll be leadin' the way.


Jack grabs the map and his compass and looks at them.


JACK
(With great authority, he holds the map out
in front of him and barks out an order)
We will be proceeding in THIS direction!
(Jack turns towards the Wench and walks into the sea)


JACK
(putting the map down and looking at the Wench)
That can't be right.


Mercer grabs the map out of Jack's hands, turns it right-side-up, then puts it back into Jack's hands.


JACK
(takes the map from Mercer)
Oh!
(starts walking towards the jungle)
Lack of rum, Mercer. I did warn you.


Mercer rolls his eyes. Then he, Edwards and the EITC marines follow Jack into the jungle.
 
I think it's the best we got, since it uses as many of our ideas as I think is possible. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" />
 
I like it as well, as I stated earlier. I guess if you want to take out Jack's bumble after he leaves the boat, we can insert this scene into the script and start work on the next. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />
 
Wow... having been out so long, I'm afraid that I'll have to slowly work my way through all this! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" /> I've read the scrip thus far posted in the first page, and will try to get up to speed on all this.
From what I've read in the script... blimey! I can see the movie in my mind... and it is AMAZING! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />)
 
Good to have you back, Commodore. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" /> I hope the script is taking the shape we want and that others will love. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />
 
<!--sizeo:4--><span style="font-size:14pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->CCOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOODDDDDOOOORRRREEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec-->

<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/bow.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":bow" border="0" alt="bow.gif" /> YOU ARE BACK! We were starting to miss you. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />



Here everyone check out this updated script. I made some slight changes, nothing major. I can easily change it because i saved the original scene and separately, my own additions. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" />

Enjoy!!

INT. CAPTAINS CABIN, WICKED WENCH - DAY

JACK IS SEEN STANDING WITH HIS BACK TO THE DOOR, LOOKING OUT
THE STERN WINDOWS. FOOTSTEPS ARE HEARD AND JACK TURNS HIS
HEAD SLIGHTLY TOWARDS THE DOOR, THE DOOR IS OPENED QUICKLY
AS MERCER ENTERS.


MERCER
(COLDLY)
Mr. Sparrow, are we running late?
AGAIN?!



JACK
Of course not! CAPTAIN Jack
Sparrow is always due where he is
prompt! Er, prompt where he is
due. Ahem...


19.



MERCER
Oh, well we were PROMPTLY due at
Turtle Rock several days ago if my
Lord Becketts calculations are
correct.



JACK
(TURNING HEAD
TOWARDS MERCER)
Well, your 'lord' knows nothing of
sailing a ship then, does he?
Navigation, or the act of moving
one self from point 'a' to point
'b' is not an exact science. There
is a multitude of variables that
can delay one. Wind, currents,
weather conditions, ABSENCE OF
RUM.



MERCER
(BECOMING SWIFTLY
IRRITATED)
Really now? Then I suggest you
change that!



JACK
(CHEERFULLY)
Right! I will get the rum. Drinks
for all!



MERCER
(BRINGS OUT HIS
PISTOL, HE IS
ANGERED, BUT
REMAINS CALM)
Mr. Sparrow, would you like to be
shot?



JACK
(SMILES WEAKLY)
I'd rather get the rum.



MERCER
(COCKS PISTOL)



JACK
(HOLDS UP HIS
FINGER)
Right then, I will summon some
land for you straight away, for
apparently I am Poseidon.




20.



SAILOR
(ENTERS THE CABIN
SWIFTLY)
Cap'n, we have reached land!



MERCER
(GIVES JACK A
STERN LOOK)



JACK
(SMILES)
King of the sea, mate. Its a gift.



MERCER
(HOLSTERS GUN)
I hope you never lose it, your
highness.



EXT. WICKED WENCH, MAIN DECK - DAY

JACK AND MERCER WALK ONTO THE DECK. EDWARDS IS LOOKING
THROUGH A SPYGLASS, JACK ALSO DOES THIS.


JACK
(HANDS SPYGLASS TO
MERCER)
There's your Turtle Rock.


MERCER GIVES JACK A COLD LOOK, HE IS CLEARLY DISAPPOINTED.


JACK
Quite impressive, Mr. Edwards,
impeccable timing.
(TO THE SAILORS)
All hands prepare the boats for
landing!

FADE OUT.
 
I see you spiced it up a bit, Mercer. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" /> I like some of the Jackspeak you have put in. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />

Here are some comments on some of the altered scenes:

JACK
(CHEERFULLY)
Right! I will get the rum. Drinks
for all!

<i>I think I'd just leave it as, "Right! I'll get the rum." That seems simple, straight and more funny. It might be a bit awkward if its any longer.</i>

JACK
(HOLDS UP HIS
FINGER)
Right then, I will summon some
land for you straight away, for
apparently I am Poseidon.

<i>I think the line here also, "Right then, I'll summon some land for you straight away." works on its own. The Poseidon reference seems awkward here.</i>


Just my opinion, Mercer, but overall, like I said, I love some of the spicier language from Jack. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/onya.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="onya.gif" />
 
But without the reference to the Poseidon thing, then he cannot say "King of the Sea, mate," I thought that was one of the best lines i have ever created for him. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />
 
I thought he was being sarcastic with the Poseidon reference the first time, so I didn't see the link with the later comment. I think, though, that the "King of the sea" line still works because it can stand on its own.
 
Interesting. Poseidon is back. I put that in my first version of the scene as a reference to the god(ess) of the sea playing a role in the story later on. I do like the general idea of such a reference and I like the responses Mercer added to it with "King of the sea" and "Your highness". It's not really necessary for the scene itself, as Old Salt points out, though. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
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