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Pirates of the Caribbean: Community Prequel Script

I think the whistling one too is not working properly. This is what comes out. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":(" border="0" alt="sad.gif" />o)

Anyway, about the matter of Jack holding maps upside down. Maybe that could be a little tick of his, although there will only be a few times that he will be holding a map in the film.

If we have the GW moment just be him at the bow of the boat looking very much the leader with his arms crossed and standing erect and then come stumbling out of the boat once it hits the beach, and then have Jack a little later holding the map upside down and either correcting it himself or having Mercer correcting him, that might work. Let me write it out and see.
Like I said I think it would also be funny for the French pirate later to hand Jack the map, or have Jack walk onto the beach with the map and incorporate your scene there, Pieter. I think it would work. It would be quick and nuanced so it wouldn't really be overkill. Kind of like Indiana Jones reaching for his gun and not finding it against the swordsman.
 
The Indiana Jones joke you refer to is in Temple of Doom and references a similar event in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I think it works there, because it's in two different films. To me, having the joke repeated in the same film seems a bit overdone. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

Yep. Whistling smiley don't work no more. I'll look at fixing it when I can. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":(" border="0" alt="sad.gif" />
 
I know it was two different films, but one was a sequel to the other. I was just bringing up an example of a funny moment that can be replayed quicker the second time around.
Well, its not important enough really to be hung up debating about it. We can go ahead with the GW scene and maybe later see if it works with the French pirate.

It may be more smiley's then the whistler. Cylon posted some in another thread that came out as question marks. See <a href="http://forum.piratesahoy.net//index.php?s=&showtopic=10480&view=findpost&p=251380" target="_blank">here</a>. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
Cylon's emoticons are his own and not part of the board. They link to an external site.
 
<!--quoteo(post=251514:date=Apr 21 2008, 01:35 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 21 2008, 01:35 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=251514"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Cylon's emoticons are his own and not part of the board. They link to an external site.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Oh, I thought he was using the board's in that one. Okay.

<!--quoteo(post=251496:date=Apr 21 2008, 12:59 PM:name=Thomas the Terror)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Thomas the Terror @ Apr 21 2008, 12:59 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=251496"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Or if you do it again on the beach add this: I'm not falling for it this time!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Well, I'd rather not call attention to it the second time around because that probably would be overkill. It might be overkill already. We'll see when we get to that scene if it would work.
 
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I think that may have been your original idea, Mercer, way back. I know I loved the thought of that right away. It was brilliant!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Huh, <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" /> I have no clue. I think i might have indirectly said "Yeah, and we should also maybe have jack like George Washington crossing the delaware," I might have been joking, but everyone liked it. But its fuzzy...


I hope everyone helps. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" /> Their ideas are more than welcome. Jacarutu's re-write was stunning. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />

Pieter, i like that idea of combining the two, the failed Washington moment and the upside-down map. What if we include his failed moment, and after he disembarks, he looks at the map and says "Right, this way!" and he walks into the sea. Then he says "This cant be right," and then Mercer or Edwards comes and flips the map over and jack says "Ah! I see now, i think its the rum-withdrawal," or something like that. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />
 
How's this as an attempted merge of all our ideas? I think it's reasonable, but I'm not entirely convinced yet. This might make Jack seem a bit too foolish, with him first bumbling out of the boat after his attempted heroic landing, then the expanded upside-down chart scene. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

<div align='center'>SEA - DAY

Two boats are seen making their way to the shore. In the first boat,
JACK SPARROW is standing heroically in the front. As the boat bumps
into the shore, JACK bumbles from the bow onto the beach. His sailors
also get out. Then the second boat bumps into the shore and Mercer,
Edwards and a contigent of EITC marines get out.


JACK
(looking at the EITC marines)
So what do we need them for again?


MERCER
There might be a time when you'll be happy we took them.
Now let's have that map, if you please.


JACK
(giving Mercer a suspicious look)
As captain on this here venture of your'n, <i>I'll</i> be leadin' the way.


Jack grabs the map and his compass and looks at them.


JACK
(With great authority, he holds the map out
in front of him and barks out an order)
We will be proceeding in THIS direction!
(Jack turns towards the Wench and walks into the sea)


JACK
(putting the map down and looking at the Wench)
That can't be right.


Mercer grabs the map out of Jack's hands, turns it right-side-up, then puts it back into Jack's hands.


JACK
(takes the map from Mercer)
Oh!
(starts walking towards the jungle)
Lack of rum, Mercer. I did warn you.


Mercer rolls his eyes. Then he, Edwards and the EITC marines follow Jack into the jungle.</div>
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />


Pieter, I just got home from work, have a splitting headache and read the post as soon as I sat down, but I must say that made me laugh out loud. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> I think we can work from this. Mercer? Gun? Anyone? What do you think?
 
Lolz!!! Love it! I will be waiting to update the script until we have hammered out the dings. We need to be sure we are close to happy with it before we start the next stage. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />

I am impressed with the progress and everyones commitment. Everyone gets a drink on me!! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/buds.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":drunk" border="0" alt="buds.gif" />
 
perfect! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
Sometimes simplest is best. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />
 
That combination isn't really simple though, is it? But do I understand correctly that you people do like it?
 
<!--quoteo(post=252109:date=Apr 23 2008, 01:41 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 23 2008, 01:41 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252109"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->That combination isn't really simple though, is it?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Sure it is. That wasn't an insult. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/no.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":no" border="0" alt="no.gif" /> Sometimes we get consumed with over thinking. You streamlined it by taking bits of all our ideas.

<!--quoteo(post=252109:date=Apr 23 2008, 01:41 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 23 2008, 01:41 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252109"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->But do I understand correctly that you people do like it?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Well, it seems the three of us like it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" /> It would be nice to hear from the others though. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" /> I hope they don't think were trying to write this without them.
 
I was actually thinking that the combined version of the scene <i>isn't</i> quite as simple as either of our original versions. Which is why I wonder whether the combined version is as good as or better than the original versions. As far as the simplest scene is concerned, I think my original one is the simplest. Perhaps a bit too simple though. In which case the combined version might indeed be better. I'm not entirely convinced yet though. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
I don't think we'll ever be 100 percent happy with any one scene. There always seems to be something wanting.
Is there any one thing you are not happy with here? Jack walking into the water holding the map? I think that can work. I think you addressed the issue of the marines while still ensuring that Jack is suspicious and you were able to work in Mercer grabbing the map, which I think would be a good visual. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />

If it's an overall uneasiness with the scene we can try a few rewrites.
 
Of course. :p I will not upload it until everyone...everyone is content. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> I aim to make sure that we hear each other out and solve any little problems. I think, to shed some light on the next scene, we should have Jack and the team go through the jungle, and when they reach the village, it has its own crude water-wheel, with children playing on it, this will foreshadow the DMC water-wheel fight. I think that is clever anyways.. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" /> Then Mercer and the EITC troops spread out and make themselves at home while Jack visits the Chieftess, Tia. Now the actual capture of the slaves, i am not going to say anything because if i am right, i think we are still working on that...
 
The crude water-wheel is an interesting thought. Not that it would mean anything to the scene but it probably would have the audience thinking about the wheel fight in DMC. As for the capture of the slaves and how that comes about, I think we are still working on the whole scene. Its very much in the concept stage still.
 
<!--quoteo(post=252273:date=Apr 23 2008, 11:56 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 23 2008, 11:56 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252273"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I don't think we'll ever be 100 percent happy with any one scene. There always seems to be something wanting.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Good point. I suppose we can't really get it perfect. At one point we must simply decide: this is good enough, let's continue. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252273:date=Apr 23 2008, 11:56 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Apr 23 2008, 11:56 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252273"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Is there any one thing you are not happy with here? Jack walking into the water holding the map? I think that can work. I think you addressed the issue of the marines while still ensuring that Jack is suspicious and you were able to work in Mercer grabbing the map, which I think would be a good visual. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->The one thing I would change at least is to not have Jack bumbling when stepping out of the boat. So his George Washington moment would actually be succesful, but then he holds the map upside-down only a minute later anyway. That way we don't have the "Jack failing at seeming capable" twice in one minute. I think that'd be over-the-top. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252305:date=Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252305"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Of course. :p I will not upload it until everyone...everyone is content. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> I aim to make sure that we hear each other out and solve any little problems.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->You want to wait until everybody is 100% happy with each scene before moving to the next scene? I'd rather have the whole first draft of the script completely done, then improve the scenes later. Otherwise we'd take forever. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/piratesing.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shock" border="0" alt="piratesing.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252305:date=Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252305"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->...when they reach the village, it has its own crude water-wheel, with children playing on it, this will foreshadow the DMC water-wheel fight.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I like that water wheel. But having children play on it sounds a bit weirdish. Rather dangerous place to play. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=252305:date=Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252305"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Then Mercer and the EITC troops spread out and make themselves at home while Jack visits the Chieftess, Tia.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Tia IS the chief of the villagers then? I personally think there should be a seperate chief. Tia is more like a witch, which is usual a different person from the chief with indians, right? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=252434:date=Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252434"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->The one thing I would change at least is to not have Jack bumbling when stepping out of the boat. So his George Washington moment would actually be succesful, but then he holds the map upside-down only a minute later anyway. That way we don't have the "Jack failing at seeming capable" twice in one minute. I think that'd be over-the-top. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Hmmm. No GW moment? I like that image of Jack standing at the front of the boat with his hands on his hips and one leg up and then stumbling off the boat but I do see your point. I wouldn't want to lose it too though.

<!--quoteo(post=252434:date=Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252434"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I like that water wheel. But having children play on it sounds a bit weirdish. Rather dangerous place to play. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Maybe. I don't know if the villagers would have the same over protective sense that we would have. Its a different culture. Children are called on to do far more.

<!--quoteo(post=252434:date=Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 24 2008, 11:10 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252434"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--quoteo(post=252305:date=Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 24 2008, 03:55 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=252305"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Then Mercer and the EITC troops spread out and make themselves at home while Jack visits the Chieftess, Tia.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Tia IS the chief of the villagers then? I personally think there should be a seperate chief. Tia is more like a witch, which is usual a different person from the chief with indians, right? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
That's a good point, Pieter. I have been thinking she was one of the chiefs too, but she would actually be the village witch. So with that in mind, does Jack necessarily go see her first or the chief?
 
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