I updated a few things, cut some, and improved fluency. Please comb through it, and the stupid idea is the one that isnt mentioned. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="
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PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: HOIST THE COLOURS
FADE IN:
EXT. ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE - DAY
CAMERA PANS ALONG A BEAUTIFUL ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE FOLLOWING
THE ROAD TO LONDON.
<b>MUSIC: Becketts theme, Harpsichord with many flourishes,
strings, and light brass accompaniment. </b>
EXT. LONDON WATER FRONT, EITC HQ - DAY
<b>Music: Simple Harpsichord of Becketts theme. </b>
MERCER
(WALKS DOWN STEPS
TO ESCORT
NATHANIEL TO
OFFICE)
Post Captain Nathaniel Edwards?
NATHANIEL
(STEPPING OUT OF
CARRIAGE)
Yes, Mr. Mercer.
MERCER
Good, you made it. Lord Beckett
wishes to see you. This you must
have already anticipated.
NATHANIEL
(SLIGHTLY
INTIMIDATED BY
MERCER)
Yes, sir. I was sure I would not
just go to work.
(CHUCKLES, WHICH
DIES AWAY)
<b> MERCER
(NOT THE SLIGHTEST
CHANGE IN
EXPRESSION)
Don't worry, you will be put to
work soon enough. Lord Beckett is
a busy man, and one individual is
complicating his work.</b>
2.
<b> NATHANIEL
(Confused)
Its not me is it?
MERCER
No. You will receive more
information about this individual
as soon as we see Lord Beckett
</b>
MERCER
Good. Follow me.
MERCER AND NATHANIEL WALK INTO BUILDING.
INT. BECKETTS OFFICE - DAY
GUARDS OPEN DOORS. MERCER AND NATHANIEL ENTER. NATHANIEL
POLITELY REMOVES HAT.
BECKETT
(SMILES)
Ah, Post Captain Edwards, I am
glad you made it safely.
BECKETT OFFERS GLASS OF BRANDY TO NATHANIEL. MERCER LEAVES
ROOM.
NATHANIEL
(POLITELY)
Thank you Lord Beckett.
NATHANIEL ACCEPTS BRANDY.
BECKETT
I had you brought here to discuss
your first assignment. There is a
troublesome issue that must be
addressed. A captain of mine, Jack
Sparrow, is usually behind
schedulel on his shipments. I have
one of great importance that need
be completed, and you are to
escort him on this. Mercer will
also be along.
(AS IF TALKING TO
NO ONE)
Am I right?
MERCER (OS)
Yes, Lord Beckett.
NATHANIEL IS STARTLED BY MERCERS APPEARANCE.
3.
<b> NATHANIEL
THE Jack Sparrow, sir? If you
don't mind my asking.
BECKETT
Yes, THE Jack Sparrow as you have
said. He has caused quite a drag
for us.
</b>
<b>NATHANIEL
(Clicks his heels)
Aye, sir.</b>
BECKETT
(Smiles)
Ah, very good. Thank you Post
Captain, that will be all.
EDWARDS BOWS HIS HEAD, TURNS AND WALKS OUT OF THE ROOM.
EXT. WICKED WENCH SAILING ALONG THE ENGLISH COAST - DAY
YOU SEE A SILLHOUETTE OF A SHIP REMARKABLY SIMILAR TO THE
BLACK PEARL. THE CAMERA PANS ALONG THE SIDE OF THE SHIP. YOU
SEE A CAPTAIN WALKING ALONG THE DECK WITH HIS HANDS BEHIND
HIS BACK. YOU SEE HIM FROM BEHIND. HIS FACE IS NEVER
REVEALED.
SAILOR
<b>(From up in the
yards)
Sir, London ho!!</b>
<b> JACK
(His voice is
different, more
elegant)
Furl mainsails!! We have a strong
westerly wind.
</b>
THE CAMERA PANS DOWN BEHIND THE SHIP WHERE THE WORDS "WICKED
WENCH" ARE. THE WENCH CONTINUES UP THE THAMES.
EXT. EITC WATERFRONT DOCKS - DAY
WENCH IS TIED UP AND GANGWAY IS LOWERED. SPARROW WALKS OFF.
YOU SEE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH A TIDY EITC UNIFORM ON.
AS HE STEPS OFF THE GANGPLANK MERCER STANDS WITH 10 EITC
GUARDS, BARRING HIS PATH.
4.
MERCER
Curious, I was sure Lord Beckett
ordered the shipment to arrive 2
weeks ago, but you have only just
arrived. Why so late?
JACK
A man is never late, just not
early.
MERCER
(Scoffs)
JACK
Oh, I thought my orders said to
have it here two weeks from two
weeks ago.
MERCER
(His grim
expression never
changes)
JACK
(Smiling uneasily)
Actually I was stopped by
a...convoy of yours to...inspect
my ship.
MERCER
Were you now.
JACK
...Yep, thats how it happened. It
all a terrible misunderstanding
gents.
<b> MERCER
Lord Beckett is growing impatient.
Your commission might hang in the
balance.</b>
<b> JACK
(Is visibly stung
by hearing the
comment)
My commission? Lord Beckett cannot
afford to lose a captain with my
sailing experience...you're
bluffing.
</b>
5.
<b> MERCER
We'll see. Lord Beckett still
wishes to see you.</b>
JACK
I'm here aren't I?
MERCER
Never when you are expected
though.
MERCERS TESTED PATIENCE AT AN END, HE BRINGS OUT HIS PISTOL
AND NODS TO THE GUARDS WHO SEIZE SPARROW AND CARRY HIM OFF
TO BECKETTS OFFICE.
INT. BECKETTS OFFICE - DAY
Sparrow is escorted in with Mercer entering from behind.
BECKETT
(Looking out a
window)
Mr. Sparrow...
JACK
(Slightly Insulted)
Captain...Captain Sparrow.
BECKETT
It remains to be determined if you
are still able to rate that rank,
Mr. Sparrow. For now I am just
glad you were able to find your
way here.
JACK
I had a little help.
(Glances Nervously
at Mercer)
BECKETT
Maybe that's all one needs; a
little help.
(Turning around)
So, I find yet another shipment is
late as are you.
JACK
A man is never late...'e's just
not early.
6.
BECKETT
Is that so? Well seeing that you
are never early which could
possibly mean that you are never
on time then why should I still
employ you?
JACK
(Astonished)
Because! I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.
BECKETT
(Quickly)
For the moment you are.
JACK
What's that supposed to mean?
BECKETT
(Looking sternly
at Jack)
The Wench can sail with or without
you at the helm.
JACK
(Quick, and
desperate)
But I'm the only one who can coax
the speed out of her sails.
BECKETT
Oh, yes, how could I have
forgotten. I am getting terrible
at forgetting things, but there is
something despite that, which I
have not forgotten.
JACK
(Obviously
uncomfortable)
What's that then, eh?
BECKETT
(Emphatically)
That being a mission for you, one
last chance to redeem yourself as
it were.
JACK
(Smiles weakly)
7.
BECKETT
Are you up to the task, captain?
(pauses for
emphasis)
Or will you let me down again Mr.
Sparrow?
JACK
(The dropping of
his title at the
end of Beckett's
line not lost in
him, he replies
quickly)
Always up to not letting you down.
BECKETT
Good. Good.
(Begins pouring
Brandy for
Sparrow)
Then I hope you will prove to me
that I entrusted this assignment
to the right man.
JACK
(Feeling better
about the
situation)
Ah, proving oneself, 'tis the act
of showing another that he can do
things right...
(Grabbs a goblet
containing Brandy)
...with the proper compensation.
In doing things right he therefore
shows the other that he has in
fact been proven. Eh?
(Empties goblet)
BECKETT
Why of course Captain, it is just
good business.
JACK
(Pouring another
cup of brandy)
Were I in a busy mood, what then
might i busy myself with?
BECKETT
There is a shipment of great
importance to the East India
Trading Company, and me. I cannot
(MORE)
8.
BECKETT (cont'd)
discuss the contents, but you will
see when you get there. Mercer and
another individual: Post Captain
Edwards will accompany you on this
endevour to ensure its speedy
transport.
JACK
(Chokes on brandy
after hearing of
Mercers job)
Well, we...I. Thats perfect I will
ensure that no one is disappointed
at all, saavy?
BECKETT
(Nods)
JACK
(Slyly)
I am going to meed ammunition for
my ship, and some extra comforts
to help the long voyage go easily,
savvy?
(Glances at a
barrel of rum in
the corner)
BECKETT
You will have the ammunition and
what ever else it is that
satisfies you.
JACK
(Smiling. Replies
quickly while
turned to Mercer
and pointing at
Beckett with both
hands)
Good man!
BECKETT
(Sniffs)
JACK
Perfect we will set sail as soon
as the rum is loaded.
(Realizing his
mistake to say
rum, he quickly
replies)
(MORE)
9.
JACK (cont'd)
along with the ammunition.
BECKETT
Good, Mercer and Edwards will be
with you shortly.
JACK
(Smiling
disarmingly)
Thank you kind sir.
<b>Sparrow walks out of the room. Mercer remained, unmoving. </b>
<b>BECKETT
(Waiting for the
doors to close)
Mr. Mercer, I am under the
impression that you will assure
that the cargo will arrive INTACT
and on time, with or
without...dissident crew members.</b>
<b>MERCER
Yes, sir.</b>
<b>BECKETT
Be warned, I suspect that some of
our competition may plan to take
the competition up a notch. There
is a squadron located to the south
of your destination, you may use
your discretion to signal on them
if you need the assistance.</b>
<b>MERCER
(Nods)
And if Sparrow has a problem with
transporting the cargo?</b>
<b>BECKETT
(Sipping brandy
while looking out
the window at the
docks)
Use your imagination.</b>
<b>MERCER
(A slight smile on
his lips)
Yes, sir.</b>
10.
EXT. EITC WATERFRONT DOCKS - DAY
JACK WALKS PROUDLY ALONG THE DOCKS, EYING THE OCCASIONAL
WOMAN, WHEN HE SEES THE CARGO BEING LOADED ONTO THE WENCH HE
ABRUPTLY STOPS.
JACK
(Flailing hands
all about while
running)
Oi! Oi! Hold on there gents! Wait!
JACK STOPS AT A CRATE BEING CARRIED BY TWO CREW MEMBERS.
JACK
Open the crate please, this is the
captains cargo inspection.
CREW DO AS BIDDEN. JACK GRABS A BOTTLE OUT OF THE CRATE.
JACK
(GULPING SOME OF
THE RUM)
Very well done gents, carry on.
THE CREW MEMBERS LOOK STUPIDLY AT JACK FOR A COUPLE OF
SECONDS, SHRUG THEIR SHOULDERS, AND CARRY ON LOADING.
MERCER
(Startling Jack)
Mr. Sparrow, I would like to be
underway as soon as time permits.
JACK
(Arrogantly)
Ahem, my name is "Captain" Jack
Sparrow...savvy?
MERCER TURNS QUICKLY AND WALKS OFF DECK. JACK BOARDS THE
WENCH.
NATHANIEL
(Warmly)
Hello, Captain are all things
ship-shape?
JACK
(Watching the last
crate of rum
being loaded)
Yep, pretty much.
(Yells)
All hands! Raise anchor! Cast off
the lines. You know Oi! Oi! Oi!
(MORE)
11.
JACK (cont'd)
and the lot.
Ship is set off to sea, Jack being too worried about his
precious rum, fails to notice a large number of ships being
readied for another mission of Becketts...
EXT. MAIN DECK, WICKED WENCH. (DUSK) - NIGHT
Sparrow stands at the wheel enjoying the breeze of the
evening.
JACK
Mr. Wilsson, I think we owe our
guests a good hearty,
strong...ummm...magnificent meal,
so...step to.
WILSSON
(Annoyed)
Yes, Captain.
SPARROW STANDS THERE TO WATCH THE FINAL RAYS OF SUNLIGHT
SLINK BENEATH THE HORIZON. HE TURNS WHEN A QUICK GREEN FLASH
LIGHTS THE AREA FOR JUST A SECOND. SPARROW TURNS QUICKLY,
BUT SEES NOTHING.
CAMERA PANS TO SHOW THE SHIP SAILING OFF INTO THE DARKNESS,
STERN LANTERNS ALIGHT.
WILSSON
(Poking head out
from door)
Captain, dinner is served.
<b>JACK
Good, invite Mr. Edwards and his
villainous watchdog to dinner.</b>
WILSSON NODS HEAD IN QUICK SALUTE, THEN SCURRIES OFF.
INT. WICKED WENCH, CAPTAINS CABIN - NIGHT
SPARROW AND RANKING OFFICERS ARE SEATED AT THE HEAD OF THE
TABLE AS MERCER AND EDWARDS ENTER.
JACK
Glad you all made it safely.
SHOWS EVERYONE EATING THROUGH THE STERN WINDOWS.
12.
NATHANIEL
So, Captain Sparrow do you enjoy
your journeys?
JACK
Utter enjoyment mate.
(Clearly trying to
make sure Mercer
hears)
I always stick to my duties of the
EITC. There was never a deviation
from my orders at anytime in me
career.
MERCER
(Picks at food and
sets down fork,
looking at Jack)
Never a deviation from YOUR orders
maybe Mr. Sparrow, but orders
given by others.
JACK
(Squints his eyes
at Mercer)
I thought we were past all of this
mate.
MERCER
Past it?
(Swallows his rage
with a piece of
meat and glares
at Jack)
Maybe you are past it, but the
EITC has suffered loss from your
untimeliness
JACK
I am terribly sorry, if there are
any delays to be had on this
mission I shall inform you
immediately. On a higher note, why
are you on this mission Mr.
Mercer?
MERCER SUDDENLY BEGINS CHOKING. BEFORE ANYONE CAN REACT HE
POUNDS HIMSELF ON THE CHEST AND SPITS OUT A CHUNK OF MEAT.
THE OTHERS STARE AT HIM. MERCER SEEMS NOT TO NOTICE THEIR
ASTONISHED LOOKS.
13.
JACK
(Staring at Mercer
in utter
disbelief)
Under orders not to choke?
MERCER
(Shakes his head
and looks down,
picking up fork
again)
Just remember the deadline this
time, that is of higher
importance.
JACK
(Still in a bit of
shock over what
he just
witnessed, he
smiles weakly at
Mercer)
See, there comes a moment when
things are of the importance, but
on the lower-side of said
importance, and a moment where
there is a loftier side of the
importance. I would probably rank
this importance at about
upper-lower side, or lower-lofty
side of importance, but seeing
that you think it is a bit
important i will rank it
mid-lower-lofty importance on my
absolutely...strung out chart of
importance.
STIFLED LAUGHTER CAN BE HEARD AMONGST THE OFFICERS.
MERCER
(Confused)
Mid-lower-lofty side?
JACK
(Quickly and
intelligently)
Or mid-upper-lower side if you
would. Possibly a tad lower than
the median of the mid-upper-lower
side, savvy?
14.
ALL THE CREW, UNABLE TO CONTAIN THEMSELVES ANYMORE BREAK OUT
LAUGHING. EVEN EDWARDS LAUGHS. MERCER LOOKS AT HIS PLATE IN
SHAME AND ANGER.
MERCER
I don't think it is funny, Mr.
Sparrow.
(The Crew stops
laughing when
they see the cold
anger in the eyes
of Mercer)
Keep in your consideration why you
are on this trip, and what would
happen if you fail. Good evening,
gentlemen.
<b> JACK
(Uneasy about
Mercers speech.
He looks up at
the officers.)
We should change the subject.</b>
EXT. QUARTER DECK OF THE WICKED WENCH - NIGHT
JACK LEANS ON THE RAILING LOOKING ACROSS THE MOONLIGHT
SPATTERED SEA. EDWARDS IS WORKING ON A POSITION FIX USING A
SEXTANT
JACK
So how do you like sailing at sea?
NATHANIEL
(Continuing with
his sextant)
Ah, the sea; always changing,
never contained.
JACK
That, my friend is the definition
of freedom. I am a man of the
sea...of freedom.
NATHANIEL
(Drops what he is
doing)
You seem to care much for your
freedom.
JACK
That I do.
15.
NATHANIEL
(Earnestly)
This ship does not belong to
Beckett, does she? She's your own
ship, right? Then why are you not
off on your own?
JACK
You know, I have absolutely no
idea.
NATHANIEL
You long to be free, as do we all.
But we are all pawns in the
greater chess game.
JACK
Pawns? Trifles. I would be a
Knight in this chess game, because
Beckett doesn't understand how
much he will lose if he removes
me.
NATHANIEL
I'm afraid Lord Beckett knows
exactly what he will lose by
removing you...nothing. You are a
good man, Jack. Just a little
misguided.
JACK
Misguided? On this mission? More
like misinformed. I hardly know
what this is all about.
NATHANIEL
(Quietly)
Neither do I. But do be careful.
There seems to be more at stake
than you realize. Mercer is not
here for nothing.
JACK
Always a lack of information. Why?
MERCER
Lord Beckett knows the value of
information.
JACK
(Surprised)
Shouldn't you be in bed by now?
16.
MERCER
I get that often. Usually it is
that individual's last words. I
hope they won't be yours.
EXT. WICKED WENCH IN THE ATLANTIC - DAY
THE SHIP IS SAILING ALONG WHEN SMOKE IS SEEN IN THE
DISTANCE, AND A SHIP IS SEEN ANCHORED WITH A LARGE EITC FLAG
WAVING IN THE WIND. THE WENCH APPROACHES, AND MERCER MAKES
SURE JACK RUNS UP THE COLORS. A SMOKING WRECK OF A PIRATE
BRIG IS SLOWLY SINKING BENEATH THE WAVES. CREW FROM THE EITC
SHIP ARE ALL OUT IN THE WATER IN BOATS.
JACK
What in the devil happened here?
MERCER
Pirates. Scum. Its a good riddance
with less of them in this world.
JACK
(His eyes
transfixed on a
pirate flag
floating in the
water.)
Pirates? There's no proof of that.
MERCER
(Annoyed)
You're staring right at their
flag. Now quit lolly gaging and
run out the boats.
JACK
(Mutters)
I ought to gag you.
(Shouting)
Alright chaps, run out the little
dingies and assist our friends out
in their little dingies, savvy?
<b>THE BOATS ARE LOWERED AND THE CREWS ROW OUT TO THE WRECK.
THEY SEARCH FOR A WHILE POKING BODIES WITH OARS TO SEE IF
ANY LIVE. </b>
<b>
MERCER
(Shouting, Clearly
impatient)
I want every marine in a boat to
shoot every floating corpse to
(MORE)
17.
MERCER (cont'd)
make sure they're dead.</b>
THE MARINES SHOOT THE BODIES, MOST ARE ALREADY DEAD, BUT
SOME START SCREAMING AND SWIMMING FRANTICALLY AWAY UPON
HEARING THE ORDER, THEY ARE CUT DOWN.
JACK
(Severe look of
stress on his
face. He
obviously feels
sorry for the
pirates.)
NATHANIEL
(ALSO AFFECTED BY
THE RUTHLESS
KILLING. HAS A
LOOK OF CONCERN
ON HIS FACE.)
Better to die by a bullet, then by
perishing at sea. Sharks, hunger,
thirst a painful death for them.
JACK
Yes, of course.
CAMERA PANS TO SUNSET.
FADE OUT.
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