• New Horizons on Maelstrom
    Maelstrom New Horizons


    Visit our website www.piratehorizons.com to quickly find download links for the newest versions of our New Horizons mods Beyond New Horizons and Maelstrom New Horizons!

Pirates of the Caribbean: Community Prequel Script

Ok I was out of inspiration to go on. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />

This was my first one. Maybe it's good maybe it's bad. Opinions pls.
 
<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I think we have covered the sea-battle, but i might have a new twist to add to it i will post it a bit down this post. We have many ideas of the sword fights.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Sea battles and swordfights aplenty. No worries there. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/no.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":no" border="0" alt="no.gif" />
And we can even add a musket fight in the jungles of Indonesia and the siege of Batavia. There's not many pirate films that have THAT! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/w00t.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":woot" border="0" alt="w00t.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->(4) a storm at sea, with the survivors washed ashore<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I dont like the survivor thing, but the storm can happen.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->The Flying Dutchman sighting will be in a storm. So check that one off the list as well. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
I agree there is no need for the survivors thing. Doesn't really have a place in our story, does it?

<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->(1) an escape from a hostile port<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I like this idea, its a good idea, so lets roll with it.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Escape from the Spanish town with Jack-as-monk chased by an angry mod. Check. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/razz.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":razz" border="0" alt="razz.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Okay, about the twist, why dont we have a few other renown pirates, Teague, Ching, Capitane Chevalle, and a few others help the Pearl escape? They might see the Dutchman attempting to help her out of the fray, but it isnt going so well, because i agree the dutchman is not invincible, so she will be taking alot of damage holding the pearls hand out of the battle. Maybe Edwards can help with the Phalanx idea from the Commodore, his ship's magazine explodes, and the Pearl is now in even more trouble. So now BBBAAAAMMM!!! Pirates come in bow chasers blazing, camera wheels quickly around to reveal this. Then they help the pearl out and we will go from there. Just a little twist i thought of Pieter, might like it with the boarding idea.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I think there is a slight problem with our sea battle ideas. It'll be too incredibly big. Now I would LOVE having an incredibly big sea battle in a PotC film, but really it wouldn't belong in the first film of the series when even the AWE sea battle in the maelstrom would be smaller scale than this one. We need to come up with some ideas where the sea battle does not need to be so big so that we can save the REALLY big one for the AWE sequel. How about we make the battle between the Wicked Wench and the French pirate the main battle of our film and have the Black Pearl escape battle involve more ships, but only have a short part of that up close and show the rest from a distance while the Pearl's sailing away. I think we must resists the temptation to go with the "bigger is better" route. And I agree to being tempted to go bigger myself; I was the person who came up with the idea of involving the VOC fleet in the battle as well.

<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I am glad everyone liked it, i just thought to my self at that point "We need one of those memorable lines that can go in those special TV trailers," and so i put that in. I just saw the opportunity to do that and i went with it.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Good one! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=224252:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:41 PM) [snapback]224252[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->PS. Keep up the good editing work, that's what makes all the errors vanish when we have 5,6,even 7 people read over it, and correct different mistakes and fluency problems. All i do is lay the ground work, you guys (and me occasionally acting on someone elses idea) need to embellish it, and build on it. Ted and Terry are only two, and if they both have the same ideas the script is kind of...blah. But with many people we have many different points of view and different types of ideas that can really make this a blast.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I agree. By working on the same story with so many people, we really do get to use the best ideas of all in the final script, which should make it all the more a good story! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/w00t.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":woot" border="0" alt="w00t.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=224253:date=Dec 3 2007, 11:47 PM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Dec 3 2007, 11:47 PM) [snapback]224253[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Then we can move on, to the STORM. Bum...bum....BUUUUUUM.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->How many storms will we add? The Flying Dutchman sighting will be in a storm as well, right? But that one would be on the voyage from the Caribbean to Indonesia when passing the Cape of Good Hope. Right? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
 
About Gunsmith's scene: I think we can put that to use. A bit coincidental that the "Land ho" would be called at the same time that Mercer starts complaining, but it makes for a fun scene, so who cares? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" />
I made some slight additions. I hope you don't mind.<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->INT. WICKED WENCH, JACKS OFFICE - DAY

Jack is staniding in his office and looking throughout the windows.
Footsteps are heard. Jack turns his head slightly towards doors.
Mercer opens the door and enters.
Jack turns towards doors.


MERCER
(angry)
Mr. Sparrow... Are we running late? Again ?!



JACK
...Of course not. CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow is never late.



MERCER
Oh really? We should have seen land two days ago!
(pointing at him)



<b>JACK
How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, <i>absence of rum</i>.</b>



MERCER
You better do something about that or... (grabs his pistol)



<b>JACK
Sure. I'll summon some land for you straight away. Who do you think I am? Poseidon?</b>



SAILOR
(Heard form the deck)
Land ho!!!



Jack smiles at Mercer.



EXT. WICKED WENCH, MAIN DECK

Jack and Mercer walking out of Jack's office.
We see some sailors passing by them as they
walk towards Edwards who is looking through the spyglass.
Jack grabs his own spyglass and looks.



JACK
(to Mercer)
There's your land.



<b>Mercer grumbles. Clearly he is disappointed.



JACK
Set a course along the shore, if you please, Mr Edwards.



EDWARDS
Aye aye, captain!



Jack walks into his cabin and returns on deck with some charts. He starts observing the coastline and comparing it with the charts.



JACK
Very impressive, Mr. Edwards. Right where we should be.
(to the sailors)
Prepare the boats for landing!</b><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
 
Very good Gunsmith and Pieter!!! Pieter be sure to put this under the thread in the front so i dont have to search for half an hour. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />
 
Done. I updated the thread index, adding several new notable posts. The index is becoming a bit big though. Perhaps we need to remove some posts from the index. Most notably the script excerpt postings, because these are already in the full script anyway. Does anyone mind that? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />
<b>Edit:</b> I also updated the full script <a href="http://www.s31clan.com/privateftps/pietersmods/others/potc_hoist_the_colours.htm" target="_blank">here</a>, adding the <i>night conversation</i> and <i>land ho</i> scenes. There's some missing scenes inbetween, so these need to be filled in. Does anyone think that as soon as we finished the script up to the Africa landfall, we should first go over the entire first part of the script and look at it again with fresh eyes?

In above script scene I added the "Who do you think I am? Poseidon?" to add a tiny little hint of the thought of a god of the sea in the films. So in effect this would be a tiny hint to Calypso eventually turning out to be the godess of the sea. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
Also perhaps the "absence of rum" line could be replaced with something funnier. I was writing up a summation of things that make navigation an inaccurate sciene and thought we'd need to add some weird Jack remark there as well. Otherwise it'd be a bit of a dull line. Also I took the "Navigation is not an exact science" line from Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark (RotLA). There Belloq says "Archeology is not an exact science". I thought that would be a funny injoke, especially since there are some obvious RotLA-influenced scenes in CotBP, most notably Elizabeth hiding a knife in the Barbossa dinner scene.

I also had a thought on a fun thing Jack could say when Mercer <i>again</i> interrupts a conversation with his sinister presence:<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->JACK
Do you really HAVE to interrupt our every conversation? We get the point, you know?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->I can imagine the audience (meaning me as well) getting a bit tired of Mercer being used as "threatening presence" all the time. So we could add this line and then after that play down on the threatening Mercer aspect. After all: We don't have to KEEP reinforcing the same point over and over again, right? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/whistling.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":wp" border="0" alt="whistling.gif" />

Just re-posting some old thoughts on scenes that have been written now. Perhaps there's some stuff in here that we can incorporate after all?<!--quoteo(post=221701:date=Nov 16 2007, 05:26 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Old Salt @ Nov 16 2007, 05:26 AM) [snapback]221701[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--quoteo(post=221635:date=Nov 15 2007, 01:40 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pieter Boelen @ Nov 15 2007, 01:40 PM) [snapback]221635[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Great one! That would work very nicely for Jack and Edwards becoming friends. Plus it would give us the opportunity to explain Jack's character a bit more. I also like your suggestion of Jack having no idea why he works for Beckett. That sounds pretty much like Jack.
<b>Edwards:</b> "So why <i>do</i> you work for the EITC if you like your freedom so much?"
<b>Jack:</b> "You know what? I have NO idea."

I can just picture Johnny Depp delivering that line perfectly. Of course my original thought was that Jack was doing it for the extra income through the salary he would gain. So Jack would be running of on errands of his own and making profit that way, but would also still be in the employ of the EITC, thus getting more money. So basically a double pay. But your idea is much more interesting, I think. Simple, yet effective. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
<b>Edwards:</b> So why <i>do</i> you work for the EITC if you like your freedom so much?
<b>Jack:</b> (Mumbling to himself with his fingers rubbing his chin, deep in thought) That's interesting.
<b>Edwards:</b> What is?
<b>Jack:</b> (Turning to Edwards) I have NO idea.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
<!--quoteo(post=221711:date=Nov 16 2007, 10:58 AM:name=gunsmith)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(gunsmith @ Nov 16 2007, 10:58 AM) [snapback]221711[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->This night ship scene would be perfect. Just imagine Jack standing and looking at the moon. Edwards approaches him.
<b>Edward:</b> Good evening capt....
<b>Jack:</b> shhhh.....
(silence for couple of seconds)
<b>Jack:</b> Can you hear it?
<b>Edwards:</b>: Hear what ?
<b>Jack:</b> The sea. Isn't it the most beautiful thing you ever heared?
Listen to it. It's full of storys and secrets and when you listen very carefuly you can hear them.
Something like that. Jack showing some emotions.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
 
i don't see mercer being suggestive about things like with the 'or....'.l he'd more place a direct threat. he should finish his sentence. i don't know what the rest of the sentence should be, only that it should be finished.

EDIT: i've just read the rest. if he get's interrupted, so he can't actually finish his sentence, it seems fine.
 
It seems his intention is quite clear. After all: He's grabbing his gun. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
 
Well we can finish it.

<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: You better do something about that or I will. (grabs his pistol)<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Glad you liked the scene.

Edit:
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->JACK
How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Should Mercer answer this with something like
Mercer: Lord Beckett said that we......
 
Beckett is no Lord yet in the prequel. I think he was made a Lord not that long before the beginning of DMC.

Another thing that we might add to this dialog is the notion that Mr. Edwards was charged with navigation. I had originally been thinking of a conversation like this:
<i>Mercer: We should have seen land two days ago!
Jack: How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.
Mercer: You better do something about that.
Jack: If you have any complaints, Mr. Edwards is charged with navigation aboard this ship.</i>
But then I thought the better of it. After all, even if Edwards IS charged with navigation, the captain would still be responsible for Edwards' work. So such a conversation wouldn't really work very well. It would make Jack seem like a pretty bad captain if he tries to put the blame on Edwards. Actually, I think it would show a much better side of Jack if he would completely neglect to mention that he put Edwards in charge of navigation. Sort-of like taking the blame himself on purpose, rather than blaming somebody else. But Edwards is a very accomplished navigator and is doing a very good job at it. So there should be nothing to complain about in the first place. But then this whole scene makes not much sense. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/modding.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":modding" border="0" alt="modding.gif" />

Some replies that I came up with to your lines:<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: You better do something about that or I will. (grabs his pistol)<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Jack: Shooting me is not going to bring land any closer, is it?
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: Lord Beckett said that we...<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Jack: What does Beckett know of navigation?
 
I've got an addition:<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: You better do something about that or I will. (grabs his pistol)
Jack: Nice way of solving problems you've got. Shooting me is not going to bring land any closer, is it?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
 
I suggest to use a version that hasn't been written yet. We need to figure out which lines to put in and where so that it results in a conversation that makes sense. So question one would be: Why are they having this conversation? Are they really late even though Edwards is doing a good job at navigation? If so: Why are they late? If not, then why ARE they having this conversation?
 
Mercer: We should have seen land two days ago!
Jack: How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.
Mercer: You better do something about that.
Jack: <b>right, i'll get the rum.</b>

how's that? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile2.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":))" border="0" alt="smile2.gif" /> it seemed to me the meaning of mercer's sentence was a bit unclear, so i made use of it!
 
<!--quoteo(post=224376:date=Dec 4 2007, 04:32 PM:name=Morgan Terror)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Morgan Terror @ Dec 4 2007, 04:32 PM) [snapback]224376[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: We should have seen land two days ago!
Jack: How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.
Mercer: You better do something about that.
Jack: <b>right, i'll get the rum.</b>

how's that? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile2.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":))" border="0" alt="smile2.gif" /> it seemed to me the meaning of mercer's sentence was a bit unclear, so i made use of it!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />
 
JACK
(to Mercer)
There's your land.


<i>MERCER
(Grumbles. Clearly he is disappointed.)
I so wanted to shoot you.</i>


JACK
<i>(Smirks, not really sure if Mercer is serious or not)</i>
Set a course along the shore, if you please, Mr Edwards.


Changes in italics.
 
<!--quoteo(post=224376:date=Dec 4 2007, 04:32 PM:name=Morgan Terror)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Morgan Terror @ Dec 4 2007, 04:32 PM) [snapback]224376[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Mercer: We should have seen land two days ago!
Jack: How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.
Mercer: You better do something about that.
Jack: <b>right, i'll get the rum.</b>

how's that? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile2.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":))" border="0" alt="smile2.gif" /> it seemed to me the meaning of mercer's sentence was a bit unclear, so i made use of it!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
LOL!!!!! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" /> LOL!!! "I'll get the rum" hah! I could so see Jack saying that sentence.
 
MERCER
(angry)
We should have seen land two days ago!

SPARROW
How did you figure that? Navigation is not an exact science. There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.

MERCER
(frustrated)
You better do something about that.

JACK
Right, I'll get the rum.

MERCER
(draws his pistol)
Mr. Sparrow, would you like to be shot?

JACK
(smiles weakly)
I'd rather get the rum.

A tension filled moment passes, Mercer cocks his gun.

JACK
(holds a finger up)
Right. I'll get some land for you straight away.

SAILOR
(Heard form the deck)
Land ho!!!

JACK
(to Mercer)
There's your land.

MERCER
(Grumbles. Clearly he is disappointed.)
I so wanted to shoot you.

JACK
(Smirks, not really sure if Mercer is serious or not)
Set a course along the shore, if you please, Mr Edwards.
 
We'll Mercer could be angry about something else. Not for their lateness. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />
Ot maybe he's not angry at all.

Mercer: Mr. Sparrow... are you sure we're on course?

BTW.... is Edwards defenitly in charge of navigation or is it still just an idea?
 
Back
Top