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Wacky News Stories

Chatty Burglar Overstays Welcome, Gets Arrested
Texas Homeowner Chats With Intoxicated Burglar Until Officers Arrive to Arrest Him
The Associated Press
WINNSBORO, Texas



An apparently intoxicated suspect chatted with a burglary victim long enough for officers to arrive and arrest him, authorities said.

John Michael Baker, 25, of Winnsboro was jailed Friday on bond totaling $59,500, the Wood County Sheriff's Office said.

Baker was charged with burglary of a habitation and burglary of a vehicle. He was also wanted and charged in Franklin County with being a felon in possession of a firearm, possession of marijuana and burglary of habitation, a jailer told The Associated Press.

Jail records did not list an attorney for Baker.

Sheriff's Chief Deputy Debbie Foster said a woman saw a man breaking into her home, and she called her husband.

The husband hurried home and saw Baker making his getaway. He called 911 before heading over to talk to the suspect, whom he knows. The men chatted by the side of the road until deputies arrived.

Foster told the Tyler Morning Telegraph that Baker was "pretty intoxicated."


Copyright 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Copyright © 2008 ABC News Internet Ventures
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />
 
Senator Suing God Urges Judge to Proceed
Court Could Throw Suit Out Because of Failure to Serve Notice on God
By JOSH FUNK Associated Press Writer
August 5, 2008—


OMAHA, Neb. (AP) --State Sen. Ernie Chambers says his lawsuit against God might seem funny but that doesn't mean it doesn't have a serious point.

Chambers asked Douglas County District Judge Marlon Polk on Tuesday to let his lawsuit proceed. Chambers said he wants to make the point that everyone should have access to the courts regardless of whether they are poor or have the means of billionaire Warren Buffett of Omaha.

"What brought me to the point of filing this lawsuit was the ill-advised attempts by certain legislators to prevent the filing of certain lawsuits," Chambers said.

Polk said he would consider the issue and rule later.

Chambers acknowledges using wit and humor in the lawsuit he filed last September seeking a permanent injunction against God. Chambers said God has made terroristic threats against the senator and his constituents in Omaha, inspired fear and caused "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants."

The court told Chambers last week that his lawsuit may be dismissed because he had failed to serve notice on God. Chambers acknowledged that failure in court Tuesday while sitting a few feet away from an empty table reserved for God and God's attorney.

"Despite my most sincere, zealous efforts, I could not find a location to serve the defendant," Chambers said.

But Chambers asked Polk to take official notice of God, and the Almighty's omniscience and omnipresence.

Chambers argued that courts and the U.S. government already routinely take notice of God. Courts swear in witnesses with an oath that includes the phrase "so help me God." Plus, the pledge of allegiance describes "one nation, under God," and U.S. currency proclaims "In God We Trust."

And the senator said that if the court recognizes God, the deity wouldn't need formal notice of the lawsuit because he knows everything. And God would be at every hearing because he's everywhere always.

A senator for 38 years, Chambers skips morning prayers during the legislative session and often criticizes Christians. He is being pushed out of the Legislature by term limits.

Chambers said he appreciates the difficult position Judge Polk is in because of the unique nature of the case, but he hopes the lawsuit will be allowed to proceed.

"Your honor, I do not envy your position," Chambers said.


Copyright © 2008 ABC News Internet Ventures
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/mybad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":facepalm" border="0" alt="mybad.gif" /> <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/mybad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":facepalm" border="0" alt="mybad.gif" /> <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/mybad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":facepalm" border="0" alt="mybad.gif" />
 
It Pays to Go in a Public Toilet
Reuters

NEW DELHI

It pays to use a toilet in southern India, as residents are earning close to a dollar a month by using public urinals, a scheme launched by authorities to promote hygiene and research in rural areas.

Dozens of people are queuing up to use toilets in Musiri, a remote town in Tamil Nadu state, where authorities have succeeded in keeping street corners clean with the new scheme, The Times of India newspaper said on Sunday.

"In fact, many of us started using toilets for urination only after the ecosan (ecological sanitation) toilets were constructed in the area," said S. Rajasekaran, a truck cleaner.

The urine was also being collected and tested for its efficacy as a crop fertilizer, an official of the state's agricultural university added.

People relieving themselves in the open is a common sight in India's rural towns and villages, as basic sanitation still eludes millions.

(Reporting by Bappa Majumdar; Editing by Jerry Norton)

(For the latest Reuters news on India see: <a href="http://in.reuters.com" target="_blank">http://in.reuters.com</a>, for blogs see <a href="http://blogs.reuters.com/in/.)" target="_blank">http://blogs.reuters.com/in/.)</a>

Copyright 2008 Reuters News Service. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Copyright © 2008 ABC News Internet Ventures
 
Mom who joined cheerleading squad pleads insanity
Associated Press
Oct. 17, 2008, 6:07PM


GREEN BAY, Wis. — A 33-year-old woman accused of stealing her daughter's identity to attend high school and join the cheerleading squad has pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity.
Wendy Brown faces a felony identity theft charge after enrolling in a Wisconsin high school as her 15-year-old daughter, who lives in Nevada with Brown's mother.
According to a federal complaint, Brown attended one day of classes, practiced with the cheerleading squad and went to a party at the coach's house.
Brown also faces theft and forgery charges from an unrelated case, where she is accused of collecting money for an apartment she didn't have authority to rent.
She could face up to nearly 13 years in prison if convicted of all charges.
 
<b>London WWII-era bombproof tunnels up for sale</b>
By RAPHAEL G. SATTER – 2 days ago

LONDON (AP) — For sale: A labyrinth of bombproof tunnels hidden about 100 feet beneath central London. Great location, mysterious past. And the price tag? Well, that's a secret.

The Kingsway Tunnels, originally built in 1942 to protect Londoners from German air raids, are being put for sale by their current owner, telecommunications company BT Group PLC.

"We're looking for a purchaser with the imagination and stature to return the tunnels to productive use," said Elaine Hewitt, who heads BT's property division. "The site has a fantastic history and, now that we have no requirement for it for telecommunications use, it is right that we should offer it to the market. Here's hoping it has a fantastic future as well."

The tunnels, which are about a mile long, were taken over by Britain's foreign intelligence agency MI6 in 1944. The Guardian newspaper said a section of the spy agency known as the Inter Services Research Bureau used the tunnels until May 8, 1945, when it stripped them clean, leaving a question mark over the exact nature of its underground activities.

BT said the tunnels were then used by the government's Public Record Office to store some 400 tons of "highly sensitive documents." They then became property of Britain's Post Office — which at the time ran Britain's telephone network and used the site as a telephone exchange to connect long distance calls.

It was through this reinforced warren that the 1960s hot line connecting the leaders of the U.S. and the Soviet Union was routed. By the 1980s, when it became the property of BT, it housed secure data backup services and served closed circuit television cameras.

BT spokeswoman Gemma Thomas said Saturday that the company no longer needed the tunnel because the Internet was cutting down on the need for telephone exchanges. She said restrictions on the tunnels' use meant they could not be converted into a cool new concept hotel, an underground office or a subterranean home. BT suggested they might be suitable for government use or for a major corporation.

Thomas refused to reveal was BT was hoping to get from the tunnels' sale.
 
<b>Suspect in golf cart eludes Utah sheriff cruisers</b>
1 day ago

MORGAN, Utah (AP) — A Utah sheriff's office has found that it shouldn't underestimate the golf cart as a getaway car.

A suspect in a souped-up cart managed to elude officers who pursued him last month through an alfalfa field — but only for a while. He was arrested the next day at his grandmother's house.

Officers started pursuing the driver after he was spotted spinning out in a city park in Morgan. He took off into an alfalfa field and jumped irrigation ditches that the sheriff's cruisers couldn't cross.

Morgan County Sheriff's Sgt. Scott Peay suspects the cart was fitted with a car engine instead of the original electric motor.
 
<b>Japanese team finds 'yeti footprints' in Nepal</b>
8 hours ago

KATHMANDU (AFP) — A team of Japanese adventurers say they have discovered footprints they believe were made by the legendary yeti said to roam the Himalayan regions of Nepal and Tibet.

"The footprints were about 20 centimetres (eight inches) long and looked like a human's," Yoshiteru Takahashi, the leader of the Yeti Project Japan, told AFP in Kathmandu on Monday.

Takahashi was speaking after he returned with his seven-member team from their third attempt to track down the half-man-half-ape, tales of which have gripped the imaginations of Western adventurers and mountaineers for decades.

Despite spending 42 days on Dhaulagiri IV -- a 7,661-metre (25,135-foot) peak where they say they have seen traces of yetis in the past -- the team failed in their prime objective of capturing one on film.

But Takahashi said the footprints were proof enough.

"Myself and other team members have been coming to the Himalayas for years and we can recognise bear, deer, wolf and snow leopard prints and it was none of those," he said.

"We remain convinced it is real. The footprints and the stories the local tell make us sure that it is not imaginary," he added.

Photographs of the prints have been posted on the expedition's website, <a href="http://www.everest.co.jp/yeti2008/" target="_blank">www.everest.co.jp/yeti2008/</a>.

The team had set out nine motion-sensitive cameras in an area where Takahashi saw what he thought was a yeti during a previous expedition in 2003.

"It was about 200 metres away in silhouette. It was walking on two legs like a human and looked about 150 centimetres tall," said Takahashi.

Despite their lack of success this time, the team plans to continue the quest.

"We will come back as soon as we can, and we will keep coming back until we get the yeti on film," said Takahashi.
 
<b>Man sues Fla. strip club over dancer's flying shoe</b>
3 days ago

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. (AP) — An angry wife or girlfriend might not be the only thing to worry about when visiting a strip club. A man suing a Pompano Beach club claims a performer's shoe flew off during a pole dance, shattered the mirrored ceiling and caused glass and the shoe to hit him.

The lawsuit filed in Broward County by 35-year-old Charles Privette says the Booby Trap breached its duty when its employee failed to perform her routine in a reasonably safe manner. The suit seeks at least $15,000 in damages.

Privette's attorney says his client suffered a small cut to his eyebrow, headaches and nose bleeds because of the Jan. 14 pole dance. Booby Trap general manager George Gettinger acknowledges paramedics were called but said injuries were minor.
 
<b>Woman obliges after husband begs to be shot</b>
3 days ago

CENTENNIAL, Colo. (AP) — Authorities said a woman who shot her husband in the knee won't face charges because he begged her to do it. The Arapahoe County Sheriff's office said a 35-year-old woman accused her husband of being drunk and becoming violent during an argument.

She took control of a handgun during the dispute and claimed her husband begged her to shoot him and told her to 'finish it' after she fired a shot.

The sheriff's office said the 34-year-old husband was uncooperative with deputies before he was taken into custody and hospitalized. He was now being held at the Arapahoe County jail after his wife accused him of forcing her into the bathroom and holding a gun to her head before the shooting.

He faces charges of felony menacing, third-degree assault and false imprisonment.
 
<b>Police arrest Mich. man for car wash vacuum sex</b>
2 days ago

THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. (AP) — Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash.

The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County's Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

The suspect, whose name wasn't immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail.





<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" /> <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />
 
Why am I not surprised you found that story. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />

Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />

<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/24.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rofl" border="0" alt="24.gif" />
 
you know, the one with the golf cart made me think that i had been the one accused of driving it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
it's a little too coincidental. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
While browsing through the archives...

PALM BEACH GARDENS, FL-- A struggling single parent and real estate agent is trying to sell her house and find a husband. She's auctioning off both her home and herself in a package deal on eBay and Craigslist.

Single parent Deven Traboscia has been divorced for eight years. She had hoped to be remarried by now, so she is turning to the internet for help.

The real estate agent is auctioning off her Palm Beach Gardens home and herself on both Ebay and Craigslist.

In the ad, Traboscia writes:
"If you want to live the never ending dream and experience the real love, life and the romance you have always felt was a fairytale then this is the vibrant outstanding woman of your dreams! To sweep this European Loving Lady off her feet send in your application right now."

She goes on to say that her four bedroom, 2,000 square-foot home, that will be included in the deal, has "neutral colors, Berber carpet, and upgraded tile".

Traboscia says she has already been contacted by one man in Italy, who is arranging a trip to South Florida to visit her.

Her eBay auction ends July 2 and asks for a starting bid of 99 cents with a shipping cost of $500 thousand. The auction has not yet received any bids.
 
Afraid of Laundry? You Will Be After Reading This
Woman taking clothes out of washing machine finds 8-foot python mixed in with the blue jeans
The Associated Press
GORHAM, Maine



Mara Ranger will be a little paranoid doing laundry now. When she was removing clothes from the washing machine at her Maine farmhouse Wednesday, the clothes moved. She told WMTW-TV, "I jumped back" and saw a snake. She quickly shut the lid and called for help.

Maine Animal Damage Control operator Richard Burton reached into the machine and pulled and pulled — all 8 feet of a reticulated python.

Burton guesses the snake got into Ranger's washing machine through water pipes. The snake's future home will be York Animal Kingdom in York.

Ranger is going to start looking into every corner of her washing machine. She says, "I'm going to be looking in the tub first — before and after, maybe even during, the rinse cycle."


Copyright 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Copyright © 2008 ABC News Internet Ventures
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
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