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Pirates of the Caribbean: Community Prequel Script

<!--quoteo(post=248529:date=Apr 1 2008, 12:34 PM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 1 2008, 12:34 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=248529"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->"I so wanted to shoot you."
^ I wonder if Mercer really needs to say that. He can also act disappointed and get the message across without actually saying it. Somehow it sounds really weird to me to have him actually say that, though he clearly <i>thinks</i> that.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Yeah, i agree, Mercer is not a 17 year old girl. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" /> Lol.
 
I guess he doesn't need to say anything there, just trying to inject some humor. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wacko.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":wacko:" border="0" alt="wacko.gif" />
 
He can get the message accross through acting without saying it. Might serve the same humour without having him say it. Right? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_confused.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="icon_confused.gif" />
 
True. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> I think it would have been funny though if he also was able to mumble something about almost being able to shoot him. Something like...

JACK
(giving his spyglass to Mercer)
There's your Turtle Rock.

<i>MERCER
(Grumbles to himself as he takes the spyglass.)
I should have shot him.</i>

JACK
(Gives Mercer a look)
Very impressive, Mr. Edwards. Impeccable timing.
(to the sailors)
Prepare the boats for landing!
-----------------------

But I guess he can do it with a look also.
 
Yes, Mercer's looks are notorious. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> So we still have to develop this a tad bit more before i put it into the script because we need to refine it well because it is very hard to flip-flop whole scenes on my scriptwriting program... We are doing a good job though. We have a whole year before '09 when Disney might start to think about a new Pirates. We need to get moving. Also can someone ask the writers of POTC if they are willing to see our script when its done? Or do you guys think thats not necessary.
 
Not right now as we don't want to put undue pressure on ourselves. We seem to be having creative spurts with the script this past month and appear to be in the middle of one right and I am encouraged that we are targeting certain scenes and working on them exclusively instead of being scattershot all over the place with our ideas.
Sorry if I'm not making much sense, I've been driving all day and am a bit of a zombie right now. <img src="http://i180.photobucket.com/albums/x172/oldsalt_bucket/emoticons/530_confused.gif" border="0" class="linked-image" />
 
It does, i am just saying we must stay focused, but we must speed things up a bit. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> We should set something good that will only require a bit of critiquing later so we can get the basic framework of the thing done. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> I will await what Pieter says about other things in my previous post. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" />
 
Are you saying that you would like to hone at least one portion of the script and send it off to them for critique, maybe whet their appetite as it were?
 
No i am saying WE will critique it like before where we go back and add stuff after we make alot of progress. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" /> We can do it your way Old Salt, thats a good way too. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" />
 
Okay, well I agree with that, of course. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" /> I think we will be revisiting portions of the script several times over as we either come up with new ideas to add or just are looking to firm it up a bit.

<!--quoteo(post=248720:date=Apr 3 2008, 07:20 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Mercer @ Apr 3 2008, 07:20 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=248720"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->We can do it your way Old Salt, thats a good way too. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
We do want to send them the best script possible, of course, and if we feel pressed at some point to show them what we have we can go that route. Maybe it would be best at first to send them a few scenes so it just doesn't wind up being another completed screenplay that may be tossed on a pile somewhere. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ohmy.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":eek:" border="0" alt="ohmy.gif" />
 
When writing a report for school, I usually like to first write the general outline and then add the details bit by bit, rather than beginning at the begin and writing it "perfectly" straight away. I always add text halfway, then rewrite parts, then add some more text, rephrase something and so on. Tends to work fine for me. So personally I'd rather have a full rough outline and fill in the details as our brainstorming progresses rather than finishing the first part first. But I know not everyone likes to work that way. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" />

Anyway: I don't think we should show anything to the scriptwriters until we've got something that isn't just good in our minds, but is also good on paper (or on the screen, if you like <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink.gif" /> ). What we could do is send an e-mail to the webmaster of Ted and Terry's site and ask what Ted and Terry might think of a script written by "fans". But I'm not sure that's a good idea yet. At least not until we've got something to show for it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_confused.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="icon_confused.gif" />
 
We have been using the "full rough outline" model to a degree, I think, and its working. I don't think we'll ever be able to state that a portion of the script is completed because there is always the chance for more rewrites. This won't be done till its done, to paraphrase Yogi Berra. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=248737:date=Apr 3 2008, 08:06 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Pieter Boelen @ Apr 3 2008, 08:06 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=248737"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->When writing a report for school, I usually like to first write the general outline and then add the details bit by bit, rather than beginning at the begin and writing it "perfectly" straight away. I always add text halfway, then rewrite parts, then add some more text, rephrase something and so on. Tends to work fine for me. So personally I'd rather have a full rough outline and fill in the details as our brainstorming progresses rather than finishing the first part first. But I know not everyone likes to work that way. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dunno.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shrug" border="0" alt="dunno.gif" />

Anyway: I don't think we should show anything to the scriptwriters until we've got something that isn't just good in our minds, but is also good on paper (or on the screen, if you like <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink.gif" /> ). What we could do is send an e-mail to the webmaster of Ted and Terry's site and ask what Ted and Terry might think of a script written by "fans". But I'm not sure that's a good idea yet. At least not until we've got something to show for it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_confused.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="icon_confused.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I do like that to tell Ted and Terry. Make SURE you dont make us sound like a bunch of inexperienced fans that are making a bad script. From what i know that will turn them completely off of it. Maybe we can send a portion of the script to them. See how they like it... That could back-fire or it could work, its the luck of the draw. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":)" border="0" alt="smile.gif" />
 
Ahoy all.

That land ho scene is gettin' better and better. I luv it. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" />

'Bout Ted and Terry, we should give em general outline if you want.
Not the script.
Its not done and we need editing it.
Putting in descriptions etc. etc.
 
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->INT. WICKED WENCH, JACKS OFFICE - DAY

Jack is seen standing in his office, with his back to the door, looking through the stern windows.
Footsteps are heard. Jack turns his head slightly towards the door.
Mercer opens the door agressively and enters.


MERCER
(angry)
Mr. Sparrow. Are we running late? Again?!


JACK
Of course not. CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow is never late.


MERCER
Oh really? We should have come upon Turtle Rock several days ago! Beckett told me we'd be there on the 15th!
(pointing at him)


JACK
(turning to face Mercer)
Well, Beckett doesn't know much about sailing a ship then, does he? Navigation is not an exact science.
There's plenty of variables that can delay one. Wind, current, weather conditions, absence of rum.


MERCER
(getting more angry)
You'd better do something about that!


JACK
(cheerfully)
Right. I'll get the rum.


MERCER
(furious, draws his pistol)
Mr. Sparrow, would you like to be shot?


JACK
(still cheerful)
I'd rather get the rum.


MERCER
(cocks gun)


JACK
(holds up a finger)
Right. I'll summon some land for you straight away.


SAILOR
(entering Jack's office)
Capt'n! We have reached our destination.


MERCER
(gives Jack a stern look)


JACK
(smiles)
It's a gift, mate.


MERCER
(holsters gun)
I hope you never lose it, Mr. Sparrow.
For YOUR sake!


EXT. WICKED WENCH, MAIN DECK

Jack and Mercer walk out of Jack's office and onto the deck.
Edwards is looking through his spyglass.
Jack grabs his own spyglass and looks.


JACK
(giving his spyglass to Mercer)
There's your Turtle Rock.


Mercer grumbles as he takes the spyglass. Clearly he is disappointed.


JACK
Very impressive, Mr. Edwards. Impeccable timing.
(to the sailors)
Prepare the boats for landing!


EDWARDS
Aye aye, captain!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

This is great!
Maybe <b>Mercer </b>could have a line while on deck. Something like: ''Move it you dogs! We ain't got all day''.
And <b>Jack </b>replies:'' Whats the rush''?
<b>Mercer</b>: We are not on schedule. We need to speed things up.
Move it I said!

Just a thought.
 
Yes it is. Getting better all the time. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" /> Lets get back to it, then.


I thought of adding some dialogue to Mercer, instead of just grumbling, he could go:

MERCER
(Grumbles to himself as he takes the spyglass.)
I should have shot him.

---------------------------------


Just saw your last post. Would those remarks by Mercer come in the beginning of the scene, Gun?
 
I think Mercer's line "Move it you dogs! We ain't got all day." could work well after Jack's "Prepare the boats for landing!". But I think Jack's reply "Whats the rush?" is a bit superfluous and even undermines the order he just gave. You don't want to order something to your crew, then have your superior tell your crew to hurry, then say yourself that they can take their time. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wacko.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":wacko:" border="0" alt="wacko.gif" />

As for sending something to Ted and Terry: What would you propose? What I think we could so is ask the webmaster of their site what Ted and Terryr might think of a serious attempt by fans to create a Pirates 4 script. Of course we should then underline that we are trying very hard to come up with something that is genuinely good. The average fan script ranges in quality from average to bad and ours really must be able to stand up to the actual films.
 
So this is how I imagine it.
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->EXT. WICKED WENCH, MAIN DECK

Jack and Mercer walk out of Jack's office and onto the deck.
Edwards is looking through his spyglass.
Jack grabs his own spyglass and looks.

JACK
(giving his spyglass to Mercer)
There's your Turtle Rock.

Mercer grumbles as he takes the spyglass. Clearly he is disappointed.

JACK
Very impressive, Mr. Edwards. Impeccable timing.

EDWARDS:
Thank you captain.

JACK:
(to the sailors)
Prepare the boats for landing!

MERCER:
Move it you dogs! We ain't got all day!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Jack could reply with something but the scene could end like this too.
I think its good.
After this Mercers line we hear some really cool drum music and than, that cool the scene where Jack is having his George Washington moment.
And than the landing etc.


As for Ted and Terry... I think Pieters idea is quite good.
We could try it.
But we must not give up if we get a bad reply!
 
Yes, we could contact the webmasters and tell them what we are trying to accomplish, and depending on the response maybe we could send them a finished scene such as the one we are working on right now.
 
His FAILED George Washington moment, to be sure. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink.gif" />

I definitly want this script to be finished eventually. I would hate for having something as good as this abandoned after the effort we already put into it. Even if no "official" person has any interest, I'd still want to have it finished for my own enjoyment. And perhaps it can serve as amusement to fellow PotC fans. And perhaps, if we release the final version with a statement that says that it can be used free of copyrigth charge and everything for a future film, perhaps our script might become popular and be filmed after all. Also changes are that another PotC film is never made and our scriptwriting is the only way we can "find out" more about the world and the characters. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
 
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