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Wacky News Stories

*sees Morgan frantically shoving something big, bulky, and covered with a tarp out of view of his webcam* Hmmm... <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
i don't have a webcam, so there. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/razz.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":razz" border="0" alt="razz.gif" />


<b>Frenchman speaks nonstop for 124 hours to set speech record</b>
PERPIGNAN, France (AFP) - Frenchman Lluis Colet broke the world record for the longest speech after rambling nonstop for 124 hours about Spanish painter Salvador Dali, Catalan culture and other topics. The 62-year-old Catalan and local government worker spoke for five straight days and four nights to set the record in the southern French town of Perpignan.

Three notaries were on hand to recognise the feat which allows Colet to enter it in the Guinness Book of Records.

The previous record was held by an Indian man who delivered a 120-hour speech.

Colet began speaking at Perpignan's railway station on Monday by reciting the works of famous authors or using some of his own writing. He also spoke profusely about Dali, a painter he admires, and Catalan culture.

Large crowds turned out in support of Colet, who received a rapturous applause at the end of his speech.

"This is a big day for me and I dedicate this record to all those who defend Catalan language and culture," he said, his voice fainter after five days of nonstop talking.

Colet had set the record once before in 2004 when he spoke for 48 straight hours.
 
How can you even stay awake five days much less keep speaking and be coherent? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":blink:" border="0" alt="blink.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=298287:date=Jan 19 2009, 01:34 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Jan 19 2009, 01:34 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=298287"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->How can you even stay awake five days much less keep speaking and be coherent? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":blink:" border="0" alt="blink.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

Isn't that what politicans do.
 
<i>I guess.</i> <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />



In October, a man unnamed in news reports filed a lawsuit in Selkirk, Manitoba, against the woman who supposedly caused him mental distress by suing for child support. The man said he had been sound asleep during that 2006 encounter, but awoke to discover the woman having sex with him. He ordered her to "cease and desist," he said, and she complied (but nonetheless, a pregnancy resulted). [Edmonton Sun-Canadian Press, 10-7-08]
 
A "real life" succubus story! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_eek.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shock:" border="0" alt="icon_eek.gif" />
 
Couldn't he have just lifted her off? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
Its a funny image, she's having sex and he's screaming, "Cease and desist!" <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=298287:date=Jan 19 2009, 06:34 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Jan 19 2009, 06:34 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=298287"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->How can you even stay awake five days much less keep speaking and be coherent? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":blink:" border="0" alt="blink.gif" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Staying awake is easy, the guy can't get to sleep because of all the noise.
Remaining coherent is harder, but then the original report did not say that he remained coherent.

What it did say was that he made his speech at a railway station. Personally, I wouldn't have been able to make a 5 day long speech about artists, but might be able to manage one about the late arrival of the train. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin.gif" />
 
<!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->Man Found Burned In Apartment With No Sign Of Fire<!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec-->
<b>Tenn. Officials Baffled After Man Suffers Severe Burns In Apartment With No Signs Of Fire</b>

KNOXVILLE, Tenn., Jan. 20, 2009

(AP) Investigators are baffled as to how a man suffered second- and third-degree burns inside his apartment _ even though the only sign of a fire was a candle in the bathroom. Knoxville Fire Department crews found the 56-year-old victim inside his apartment bathroom Monday afternoon with third-degree burns to his face and second-degree burns to his hands.

Officials say they knocked on the door of the unit at Cagle Terrace Apartments, and went inside when they heard someone moaning.

The man, who was not identified, was later taken to a burn center for treatment.

Fire officials say their investigation is ongoing.

<i>Can anyone say Spontaneous Human Combustion ???</i>
 
I can. That's what it sounds like. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/yes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":yes" border="0" alt="yes.gif" />
 
Elizabeth Shelton, 21, filed a lawsuit in Houston in December against the truck driver that she accidentally rear-ended in a 2007 crash, while she was intoxicated, and in which her boyfriend was killed. Though she was convicted of manslaughter, she is now suing for $20,000 damage to her Lexus SUV and for "pain and suffering," basing her claim on the fact that the blameless driver she hit was uninsured. In all, her lawsuit names 16 defendants, including insurance companies and banks. Shelton is the daughter of a state court judge. [Houston Chronicle, 12-18-08]
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
 
Robert Dendy, 59, was detained by police in Tonawanda, N.Y., in November after he dropped by police headquarters to give them a holiday wreath as a token of his gratitude for their service. One of the officers happened to notice that the wreath was the same one that had just been stolen from a market next door to the station, and after investigating, found more suspicious missing goods at Dendy's home. [Tonawanda News, 11-23-08]
 
<!--quoteo(post=298768:date=Jan 22 2009, 09:15 PM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Jan 22 2009, 09:15 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=298768"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->in Tonawanda, N.Y. . .<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
this is <!--coloro:#00FF00--><span style="color:#00FF00"><!--/coloro-->much<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--> funnier when you actually know where Tonawanda is.
 
<!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->Newspaper claims suspect transformed into a goat <!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec-->

LAGOS, Nigeria (AP) - One of Nigeria's biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. In a front-page article on Friday, the Vanguard newspaper said that two men tried to steal a Mazda car two days earlier in Kwara State, with one suspect transforming himself into a goat as vigilantes cornered him.
The paper quoted police spokesman Tunde Mohammed as saying that while one suspect escaped, the other transformed into a goat as he was about to be apprehended.

The newspaper reported that police paraded the goat before journalists, and published a picture of the animal.

Police in the state couldn't immediately be reached for comment.

Belief in black magic is widespread in Nigeria, particularly in far-flung rural areas.
 
Really far-flung places. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
 
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