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Pirates of the Caribbean: Community Prequel Script

There's a Jack Sparrow in us all. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":cheeky" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
 
but i have the trait of moving around like him. somehow i never slam into something doing that. except when i miscalculated the position of the wall one day and hit it with half of myself. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/mybad.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":facepalm" border="0" alt="mybad.gif" /> those gusts of wind indoors can be pretty powerful, you know. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/whistling.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":wp" border="0" alt="whistling.gif" />
 
I wonder when those "Journey to Africa" scenes are actually going to be written...? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=220523:date=Nov 8 2007, 06:59 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pieter Boelen @ Nov 8 2007, 06:59 AM) [snapback]220523[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->[Barbossa]Agreed[/Barbossa]<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Just curious, Pieter, what was this supposed to be?
 
Heres the newest part of the script, comments appreciated! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_wink.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="icon_wink.gif" /> It probably sucks, because i have been sooo tired as i wrote it, so please tell me if anything needs to be tweaked.


EXT. EITC WATERFRONT DOCKS - DAY

JACK WALKS PROUDLY ALONG THE DOCKS, EYING THE OCCASIONAL
WOMAN, WHEN HE SEES THE CARGO BEING LOADED ONTO THE WENCH HE
ABRUPTLY STOPS.

JACK
(Flailing hands
all about while
running)
Oi! Oi! Hold on there gents! Wait!

JACK STOPS AT A CRATE BEING CARRIED BY TWO CREW MEMBERS.

JACK
Open the crate please, this is the
captains cargo inspection.

CREW DO AS BIDDEN. JACK GRABS A BOTTLE OUT OF THE CRATE.


JACK
(GULPING SOME OF
THE RUM)
Very well done gents, carry on.

9.

THE CREW MEMBERS LOOK STUPIDLY AT JACK FOR A COUPLE OF
SECONDS, SHRUG THEIR SHOULDERS, AND CARRY ON LOADING.


MERCER
(Startling Jack)
Mr. Sparrow, I would like to be
underway as soon as time permits.


JACK
(Arrogantly)
Ahem, my name is "Captain" Jack
Sparrow...savvy?

MERCER TURNS QUICKLY AND WALKS OFF DECK. JACK BOARDS THE
WENCH.


NATHANIEL
(Warmly)
Hello, Captain are all things
ship-shape?



JACK
(Watching the last
crate of rum
being loaded)
Yep, pretty much.
(Yells)
All hands! Raise anchor! Cast off
the lines. You know Oi! Oi! Oi!
and the lot.


Ship is set off to sea, Jack fails to notice a large number
of ships being readied for another mission of Becketts...


EXT. MAIN DECK, WICKED WENCH. (DUSK) - NIGHT

Sparrow stands at the wheel enjoying the breeze of the
evening. He is approached by a sailor named "Wilsson"


WILSSON
Captain Sparrow, dinner is ready.


JACK
(Overjoyed)
Great! Take the wheel Mr. Wilsson.



WILSSON
(Mumbles)
Actually I was off to catch me a
bit of a bite.


10.


INT. CAPTAINS CABIN, WICKED WENCH - NIGHT

Jack walks in to see Nathaniel seated at the table, eating.


JACK
(Takes a seat)
Ah, Mr. Edwards I wasn't expecting
you.

NATHANIEL
I figured we should chat for a bit
about...urgent matters.

JACK
(Interested)
Well, I won't hold you back.
(Fills plate)

Wilsson steps in the door slightly, glances around deck, and
then nods to Edwards, who nods back.


NATHANIEL
(Quietly)
Jack, I don't know what the
mission Beckett has planned for
you, but I need to tell you that
you should keep a weather eye out
for Mercer.



JACK
(Does that twitch
thing with his
upper lip)
Mercer, never liked that rotten
blighter, always somehow knows
whats going on.
(Studies the piece
of meat on his
fork)
Scares the begeezes out of me.



NATHANIEL
No doubt, something is amiss,
Mercer is looking for any fault in
your ways, then Beckett gave him
permission to ...conclude
business, if you fell too out of
line.


11.



JACK
Well, can't wait until this job is
done for, then I wont have to see
that treacherous bugger too often
eh?



MERCER
Is that so?



JACK
(Falls out chair,
plate with him)


A thump is heard on the deck, they notice a sliver of blood
running down a crack in the wood. Mercer turns back to pull
something out, he turns to them with a bloody sword in hand.


JACK
Ahem, hmm; we...uh...we're having
quite the delectable meal at the
moment and you have just put off
me appetite. So...shoo, shoo.
(Motions him with
his hands.)



MERCER
Oh, my apologies, next time I'll
remember to put off your life.



JACK
(Sarcastically)
Thats a shame, because if my life
is put off, then who will put the
ship into that little harbor of
yours? Eh? I don't think putting
me life out will do nothing but
place you in quite the precarious
position.



MERCER
(Wiped blood off
his sword)
I distinctly remember Lord Beckett
saying this ship can sail with or
without you at the helm.



JACK
(Sarcastically)
Thats not what I remember, I
distinctly remember, more so than
"your" distinct recollection, of
him pouring me a few glasses of
brandy.

12.



MERCER
Is that so? Well Captain Sparrow
your word is never to be
doubted...
(Turns and starts
walking out of
the room)
...unless we are the ones doing
the doubting.



JACK
Did you ever notice he has a funny
accent? I just noticed that.




FADE OUT.
 
I'm to tired right now to comment but I did find myself laughing out loud a few times. We can work with this, there are some real possiblities here. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />
 
I'll read your new entry later. Congrats for making it! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />

<!--quoteo(post=220666:date=Nov 9 2007, 01:07 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Old Salt @ Nov 9 2007, 01:07 AM) [snapback]220666[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Just curious, Pieter, what was this supposed to be?<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->You've got the [ QUOTE ] and [ /QUOTE ] tags, so I did the same with [Barbossa] tags. Just a joke. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/whistling.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":wp" border="0" alt="whistling.gif" />
 
My comments:
- I think Jack would be pretty stupid to not notice a huge EITC armada setting sail. Anyway: What kind of plot purpose does this armada have? Surely it's not the same ships already setting sail for Indonesia? That would be a bit early. Beckett doesn't even know there's going to be a problem there many months later.
- Usually a sailor would be standing at the wheel with an officer giving orders. The captain would just oversee what happens and would sometimes even be back in his cabin. It would be likely a captain would assume command himself during departure and give orders to the sailor operating the wheel himself. But a captain doing the steering himself would be rather uncommon. Of course, it COULD be that Jack IS uncommon that way and wants to sail her out of port himself.
- Wouldn't Jack, as a captain, decide when he would want to have dinner himself? I dare say he would. Also I expect it would be Jack who would invite Edwards, rather than Edwards just suddenly being in the captain's cabin. That's not very courteous at all, just entering the captain's cabin.
- This same applies to Mercer: He has no business entering the captain's cabin without requesting an audience, especially not during dinner. However, I CAN see a situation where Jack feels obliged to also invite Mercer to dinner, since he needs to make a good impression on the guy who reports directly to Beckett.
- I can see an interesting scene developing where Jack, Edwards and Mercer are all having dinner together, possibly joined by some other of Jack's officers. The conversation will probably be rather forces with Mercer impressing upon Jack that he should be careful, Jack impressing on Mercer that he is not impressed, Edwards trying to make a good impression on Jack and Jack trying to get to know Edwards. All this in a subversive manner, of course, because nobody wants to make their real intentions clear to the unwanted other party present.

So I would have the following play out:
- Jack steers the ship during departure
- When at open sea, he calls a sailor to take the wheel and hands over direct command to one of his officers
- Jack tells his steward to prepare dinner
- Jack invites both Mercer and Nathaniel Edwards to dinner
- A dinner scene plays out with all three parties present
- I would also expect Jack to request Edwards to come to his cabin for a private talk the day after
 
<!--quoteo(post=220698:date=Nov 9 2007, 06:26 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pieter Boelen @ Nov 9 2007, 06:26 AM) [snapback]220698[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->My comments:
- I think Jack would be pretty stupid to not notice a huge EITC armada setting sail. Anyway: What kind of plot purpose does this armada have? Surely it's not the same ships already setting sail for Indonesia? That would be a bit early. Beckett doesn't even know there's going to be a problem there many months later.
- Usually a sailor would be standing at the wheel with an officer giving orders. The captain would just oversee what happens and would sometimes even be back in his cabin. It would be likely a captain would assume command himself during departure and give orders to the sailor operating the wheel himself. But a captain doing the steering himself would be rather uncommon. Of course, it COULD be that Jack IS uncommon that way and wants to sail her out of port himself.
- Wouldn't Jack, as a captain, decide when he would want to have dinner himself? I dare say he would. Also I expect it would be Jack who would invite Edwards, rather than Edwards just suddenly being in the captain's cabin. That's not very courteous at all, just entering the captain's cabin.
- This same applies to Mercer: He has no business entering the captain's cabin without requesting an audience, especially not during dinner. However, I CAN see a situation where Jack feels obliged to also invite Mercer to dinner, since he needs to make a good impression on the guy who reports directly to Beckett.
- I can see an interesting scene developing where Jack, Edwards and Mercer are all having dinner together, possibly joined by some other of Jack's officers. The conversation will probably be rather forces with Mercer impressing upon Jack that he should be careful, Jack impressing on Mercer that he is not impressed, Edwards trying to make a good impression on Jack and Jack trying to get to know Edwards. All this in a subversive manner, of course, because nobody wants to make their real intentions clear to the unwanted other party present.

So I would have the following play out:
- Jack steers the ship during departure
- When at open sea, he calls a sailor to take the wheel and hands over direct command to one of his officers
- Jack tells his steward to prepare dinner
- Jack invites both Mercer and Nathaniel Edwards to dinner
- A dinner scene plays out with all three parties present
- I would also expect Jack to request Edwards to come to his cabin for a private talk the day after<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
HOLD THE PRESS!!! Jack didnt notice the CREW LOADING the EITC armada, for all he knew it was just regular harbor activity. And this armada Beckett wants to move to an EITC base in Africa, because Becketts calculating personality sees that the VOC and EITC have always been at a kind of "cold war" per-se. They have always been competing for resources and land, at least in my thoughts.

And Pieter about Jack at the wheel, Its captain Jack Sparrow, he is usually at the wheel at pivotal times like at the end of COBP. Anyways i just couldnt see Jack doing the Admiral Norrington evening stroll on the decks with his hands behind his back.

Now i can see where you were going with the Mercer, Edwards, and Sparrow talk at the dinner and I will implement it.

<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/hi.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":gday" border="0" alt="hi.gif" /> I just whipped this up because we needed to discuss it, and i just kind of got the mood in order anyways i was tired so i wasnt really thinking. I wanted to see what need be added or rewritten, obviously alot this time.
 
And once all parties discuss this, hopefully before tomorrow, then i will make the changes and re-post the modified version on Sunday, the only reason i didnt follow that schedule, was because i was Very Busy this past week, and i had only been working tid-bits on it, then i did most of it last night. I saw that many were impatient for it, and i was to so i just threw it in here and i will let you guys look at it and find any possible tweaks.
 
Why does that EITC armada need to go to the EITC base in Africa anyway? To get the EITC ships to Indonesia sooner? Do they have any story purpose? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

I dare say Jack would indeed be steering during departure, but even Jack would hand over the steering to another person when sailing at sea day after day after day. After all: A captain has other things to do. Management things.

As usual: None of my comments are meant in any way to offend you. It's just some random thoughts that popped into my head when reading your latest work.
 
<!--quoteo(post=220711:date=Nov 9 2007, 07:42 AM:name=Pieter Boelen)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pieter Boelen @ Nov 9 2007, 07:42 AM) [snapback]220711[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Why does that EITC armada need to go to the EITC base in Africa anyway? To get the EITC ships to Indonesia sooner? Do they have any story purpose? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":?" border="0" alt="unsure.gif" />

I dare say Jack would indeed be steering during departure, but even Jack would hand over the steering to another person when sailing at sea day after day after day. After all: A captain has other things to do. Management things.

As usual: None of my comments are meant in any way to offend you. It's just some random thoughts that popped into my head when reading your latest work.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Pieter, I am never offended by any comments, i just want to explain why i did things.
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/keith.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":keith" border="0" alt="keith.gif" />

First of all I would like to say hi to all of the members of this forum.
I recently found out that you are doin' some brainstorming and some writing of PotC 4.
Im also a fan of the franchise and I would like to help (in any way posible).

So.... I saw you have around 30 pages on this topic and I am gonna read them sooner or latter but for now can anyone direct me to the main story that you have written so far.
 
Welcome aboard Gunsmith, always looking for fresh minds. Go to the first page, and there is a directory to all of what we have written that is the official script.
 
Good stuff there Mercer! I too feel the same as Pieter does about what Jack does... but then again, he isn't Admiral Norrington so it may have to go as is to keep his character.
But perhaps we could portray Jack as such... out of character... so that when he turns pirate, we see his personality transform with him.
 
<!--quoteo(post=220756:date=Nov 9 2007, 04:15 PM:name=Commodore John Paul Jones)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Commodore John Paul Jones @ Nov 9 2007, 04:15 PM) [snapback]220756[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Good stuff there Mercer! I too feel the same as Pieter does about what Jack does... but then again, he isn't Admiral Norrington so it may have to go as is to keep his character.
But perhaps we could portray Jack as such... out of character... so that when he turn pirate, we see his personality transform with him.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Yep, that'll work mate! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=220702:date=Nov 9 2007, 08:26 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Nov 9 2007, 08:26 AM) [snapback]220702[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Anyways i just couldnt see Jack doing the Admiral Norrington evening stroll on the decks with his hands behind his back.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I like that image, and I agree, Jack is in no way that formal.
<!--quoteo(post=220702:date=Nov 9 2007, 08:26 AM:name=Mercer)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Mercer @ Nov 9 2007, 08:26 AM) [snapback]220702[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/hi.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":gday" border="0" alt="hi.gif" /> I just whipped this up because we needed to discuss it, and i just kind of got the mood in order anyways i was tired so i wasnt really thinking. I wanted to see what need be added or rewritten, obviously alot this time.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Good thing you did, Mercer. It has gotten us back on track in the sense that we are discussing and tossing ideas around about the next scene. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/me.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":onya" border="0" alt="me.gif" />
 
<!--quoteo(post=220756:date=Nov 9 2007, 05:15 PM:name=Commodore John Paul Jones)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Commodore John Paul Jones @ Nov 9 2007, 05:15 PM) [snapback]220756[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Good stuff there Mercer! I too feel the same as Pieter does about what Jack does... but then again, he isn't Admiral Norrington so it may have to go as is to keep his character.
But perhaps we could portray Jack as such... out of character... so that when he turns pirate, we see his personality transform with him.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
That is an intriguing thought but I think it may be a bit of a stretch where Jack is concerned. I just can't see him being the stiff formal type and then transforming into the free spirit that we come to know later on. Unless some kind of event occurred that seriously altered his core personality, it seems a bit extreme he would shift to such a degree. Even Norrington's staid manner was always there just beneath the surface after he underwent his transformation in the second film.
 
<!--quoteo(post=220743:date=Nov 9 2007, 01:46 PM:name=gunsmith)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(gunsmith @ Nov 9 2007, 01:46 PM) [snapback]220743[/snapback]</div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/keith.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":keith" border="0" alt="keith.gif" />

First of all I would like to say hi to all of the members of this forum.
I recently found out that you are doin' some brainstorming and some writing of PotC 4.
Im also a fan of the franchise and I would like to help (in any way posible).

So.... I saw you have around 30 pages on this topic and I am gonna read them sooner or latter but for now can anyone direct me to the main story that you have written so far.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Glad to have you aboard, Gunsmith. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/hi.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":gday" border="0" alt="hi.gif" /> Here are a couple of links that show the script in its current state.

<a href="http://www.piratesahoy.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=10925&st=360" target="_blank">Opening scene</a> Post #365

<a href="http://www.piratesahoy.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=10925&st=460" target="_blank">2nd scene</a> Post #473
 
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