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A Pirate Podcast with Interviews
Music, Comedy and all things Pirate!
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VERY INTERESTING STUFF
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the rule of thumb'
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Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
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The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts V Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
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Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession
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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter 'A'?
A. One thousand
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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.
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Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
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In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'
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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
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In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.'
It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'
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Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
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Cylon13
Super Zealot
<!--quoteo(post=287707:date=Nov 4 2008, 01:43 AM:name=Old Salt)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Old Salt @ Nov 4 2008, 01:43 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=287707"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->It is impossible to lick your elbow...
...At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Shit.. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="
:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> I just tried it moments before. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="
" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" /> I was just confirming that fact.. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" /> Don't blame me. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />Obviously many people can lick their elbows
<img src="http://www.abenweek.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/lick-elbow.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" />
<img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/42/74159369_4c657fed77.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" />
<img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/100/296055907_961935561b.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" />
Don't ignore this just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read it.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it wouthit a porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
Yeah, I know and I could read it without any problems.
and i already knew half of those things. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_mrgreen1.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="" border="0" alt="icon_mrgreen1.gif" />
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2008 when....
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it..
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~
NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself.
WASHINGTON—In a press conference held this morning on the White House lawn, President Bush formally asked the assembled press corps and members of his own administration if, in light of today's election, he could stop being the president now. "So it's over, right? Can I stop being president now?" Bush said after striding to the podium in a Texas Rangers cap and flannel shirt, carrying a fully packed suitcase. "Let's just say I'm done as of now. Presidency over." When informed by Washington Post reporter David Broder that his presidency would continue through early January, Bush stared at him quizzically, sighed, and shuffled silently back into the White House.
I'm sure this is made up ,but when I read it on The Onion ,I couldn't help but laugh.
RECTUM STRETCHER
While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked,
'What's your hurry?'
To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'
'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'
I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.
The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'
'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with
my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'
'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ' he asked.
'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'
Traffic Ticket - $95.00
Court Costs - $45.00
Look on the Cop's Face.................PRICELESS
The scurvvywag was having a beer in the local tavern, as the pirate entered and immediately ordered a round for everybody in the house. He slashed a stack of goldcoins on the bartable.
The scurvvywag noticed, how the pirate carried a wooden leg, his right hand was a hook and an eyepatch was covering one of his eyes. He turned towards the pirate:
-"Oh, at least piracy seems to be fortunate at the moment, aye?"
-"Well, I´ve seen better times!", the pirate answered. "Back then, the sea was full of galleons loaded to the waterline.."
-"Then excuse my curiousity, but how did you loose your leg?", the scyrvvywag continued.
-"A cannonball teared off me´leg when engaging some spaniards."
-"It must have been a terrible experience. Did you loose you hand in the same engagement?"
-"No, no no!", the pirate replied, "in a hurricane, me´matey got washed overboard and I jumped to rescue him. But I had to fight a shark first, and it bid off me´hand!"
-"Horrible experience! Cheers!"
The scurvvywag again tried to keep the conversation going, "But please tell me.. how did you loose your eye?"
The pirate looked down, all of a sudden a litlle shy. "Well..One day I looked up in the friggin´ riggin´ and this pooh from an albatross landed right in me´eye.."
The scurvvywag got really curious now:" Really, no one ever lost an eye for a pooh! How come you lost it, then?!"
-"Ooh well.." the pirate still shy. "First day with me´new hand, ya know.." -
" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
