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Wacky News Stories

<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<b>Zoo apologises after animal farting outbreak</b>
Sunday, December 14, 2008 <img src="http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2008/02/SproutsFree_175x125.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" />
Yum, yum: Brussels sprouts! Zoo-keepers have apologised to visitors for the stench coming from a gorilla enclosure after feeding the animals sprouts. 'Sprouts can cause bouts of flatulence in animals and humans. But I don't think any of us were prepared for a smell that strong,' said Michael Riozzi of Chessington Zoo in Surrey.
 
<b>Woman accused of biting man at NY basketball game</b>
19 hours ago

ROSLYN, N.Y. (AP) — A woman charged with biting a teacher at a raucous Long Island high school basketball game says she was defending herself.

Shaquana Beamon said Sunday that the teacher pulled her to the ground and kicked her Thursday as she approached her brother, a player on the Roslyn High School team.

The 20-year-old Beamon was arrested and arraigned on an assault charge Saturday. Police say she bit the teacher's arm and leg and someone else punched him in the head.

The school district's physical education director says the teacher was working as a supervisor at the rowdy matchup. Police say he was trying to break up the crowd.

The director says he was wearing a supervisor's red jacket, but Beamon disputes that.

<i>Information from: Newsday, <a href="http://www.newsday.com" target="_blank">http://www.newsday.com</a></i>
 
<b>Late-night Calif. mayor must leave City Hall by 11</b>
1 day ago

SOUTH EL MONTE, Calif. (AP) — Fed up with the nocturnal work habits of its mayor, a California city council has approved a curfew limiting how late she can work at City Hall.

South El Monte council members say they have safety and liability concerns for Mayor Blanca Figueroa, who frequently works until the wee hours of the morning. She must now leave the building by 11 p.m.

The mayor — a self-described night owl — calls the restriction petty. She says she needs to stay late because her daytime schedule is filled with meetings and her inbox is overflowing with letters from residents affected by the worsening economy.

South El Monte is a city of 21,000 about 14 miles east of downtown Los Angeles. Council members approved the curfew Wednesday.
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
 
<b>NOW AVAILABLE: PRE-CHEWED PENCILS</b>

A BRITISH COMPANY is launching a special range of pre-chewed pencils it insists will help kids concentrate at school - because students will be less likely to shove 'em in their mouths.

British design firm Concentrate specialises in products to help kids at school and identify why they get distracted or unable to focus in class.

It reckons buying a pencil with the end already chewed will encourages them to get thinking straight away.

"We know it's daft but just get down to some concentrated thinking and who knows what might happen," boss Mark Champkins said.

"We began to look at the reasons that children might be distracted, uncomfortable or unable to focus in lessons - and we set about designing some simple, cost-effective products to address some of the problems."

<img src="http://www.designboom.com/tools/WPro/images/08-november4/pencil.gif" border="0" class="linked-image" />
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> I wonder whose mouths these pencils were in.
 
I think I've heard of those. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
that's just stupid. i've heard that chewing on something actually improves concetration. backwards progress yet again.
 
<img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /> Isn't that what we live for?
 
I know who chewed them, it was Skyliners Avatar! <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/icon_eek.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":shock:" border="0" alt="icon_eek.gif" />
 
Wouldn't he/she/it have simply ate them? <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="xD:" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" />
 
<b>Burger King launches beef-scented body spray</b>
6 hours ago

NEW YORK (AP) — Looking to beef up your mojo this holiday season?

Burger King Corp. may have just the thing. The home of the Whopper has launched a new men's body spray called "Flame." The company describes the spray as "the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat."

The fragrance is on sale at New York City retailer Ricky's NYC in stores and online for a limited time for $3.99.

Burger King is marketing the product through a Web site featuring a photo of its King character reclining fireside and naked but for an animal fur strategically placed to not offend.

The marketing ploy is the latest in a string of viral ad campaigns by the company. Burger King is also in the midst of its Whopper Virgins campaign that features an taste test with fast-food "virgins" pitting the Whopper against McDonald's Corp.'s Big Mac.

Burger King Holdings Inc. shares rose 3 cents to $20.41 in midday trading. <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":rolleyes:" border="0" alt="rolleyes.gif" />
 
<b>Human-sized heart found at the Paw Paw car wash</b>
1 day ago

PAW PAW, Mich. (AP) — A human-sized heart found at a southwestern Michigan car wash has investigators wondering whether it came from a person or an animal. The organ was discovered in a corner of a manual wash bay at Soapy's Car Wash, Paw Paw police said. The owner of the business found it Monday on the floor of the bay, according to WOOD-TV in Grand Rapids and WWMT-TV in Kalamazoo.

Police first took the heart to an animal clinic, where a veterinarian was unable to determine its origin. The next stop was a local cardiologist, who said while it was "consistent in size to a human heart," he could not make a conclusive determination as to its source, said police Chief Patrick W. Alspaugh.

The chief took the organ Tuesday to Lansing's Sparrow Hospital, where forensic scientists were to examine it.

"If it's a human heart, that prompts the question, 'Then where's the body?'" Alspaugh told the Kalamazoo Gazette.

He said he didn't know when the forensic scientists will give him their findings.

If it turns out that the heart came from an animal, it would not be the first time that someone has left animal parts at the car wash

The owner told police that animal parts had been left before at the car wash, but never a heart.
 
<b>Fast-food worker laughs, tells robber to get a job</b>
22 hours ago

SAN ANTONIO (AP) — A San Antonio fast-food restaurant cashier laughed at a robbery suspect and told him to get a job if he wanted money during a failed holdup on Tuesday evening.

Police said the suspect approached the worker and demanded money, but the cashier laughed and apparently didn't realize the man was trying to hold up the place.

The suspect then allegedly pulled out a box cutter and demanded the cashier's wallet. The employee complied, but had no money in his billfold.

The suspect fled, but was caught by police who responded to the robbery call.

San Antonio police said the suspect is expected to be charged with aggravated robbery.
 
<b>1,500 parakeets rescued from 2-room apartment</b>
22 hours ago

BERLIN (AP) — Berlin officials said they have rescued 1,500 parakeets from a two-room apartment. City veterinarian Margit Platzer said the birds were flying freely around the apartment, which was "littered with feces, feathers and leftover food." Platzer said it took her team more than seven hours on Tuesday to catch all the birds with nets.

The birds were taken Wednesday to animal shelters in Berlin and elsewhere because there was not enough room for them at facilities in the capital.

Local media reported, without citing sources, that the owner gradually bought and bred the birds until his apartment was full, and that neighbors had complained about the noise and smell.

The retired man, who was not identified, could face charges for endangering the animals' safety and health.
 
<b>British pilot hits cow during emergency landing</b>
22 hours ago

LONDON (AP) — A British pilot said he ran into an unusual hazard while making an emergency landing — a cow. Rob Wotton said he was trying to land his World War II-era Tiger Moth after the engine stalled just after takeoff southwest of London on Sept. 14. He was about to touch down in a field when the animal wandered into his way.

Video of the event on YouTube shows the brown-and-white cow being knocked to the ground by the plane's lower left wing. The two-seater was damaged but landed safely.

An accident report said the cow was "apparently uninjured."

Wotton said he might paint a cow on the plane to mark the event.

He says: "I have to say it is the first cow I have ever hit in 22 years' flying."

On the Net: <ul><li>Accident Report (PDF): <a href="http://www.google.com/url?q=http://tinyurl.com/4tlltn&usg=AFQjCNG8lWwi9NUypyQ-C8s_zaNDLjWYzw" target="_blank">http://tinyurl.com/4tlltn</a></li></ul>
 
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<b>Lonely man jumps into polar bear's cage in Berlin</b>
17 hours ago

BERLIN (AP) — A man jumped into the Berlin zoo enclosure of famed polar bear Knut on Monday, but officials were able to keep the animal away from the intruder by distracting him with a leg of beef, police said. The 37-year-old man jumped over a fence into a water-filled ditch at the edge of the bear's enclosure Monday morning, police said in a statement.

Zoo keepers, who had just let Knut into his outdoor enclosure, were able to lure the bear back into his cage by producing a leg of beef.

Police said the man, a German, was less cooperative, initially ignoring instructions to leave the enclosure. He was led away unharmed but, although he was soaked and cold, he refused to undergo a medical checkup.

Police said that, before being let go, the man told them that he felt lonely and the bear appeared lonely, too.

Knut, now age 2, was hand-raised after his mother rejected him at birth. He rose to stardom early last year as a cute white ball of fluff, but has since grown rapidly into a hulking 440-pound (200-kilogram) predator.
 
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